“That’s a big part of my life – doing things that I’m not prepared to do.”

How can you get bored if the audience is cheering and laughing at something you’re doing?

I’m just a no-good, scum sucking, nose picking, boot licking, sniveling, groveling, worthless hunk of slime.

I know I’m a million times as humble as thou art!

Not any specific one, but I was a huge fan of Frank Jacobs, I guess he wrote the plurality of the song parodies for MAD, Sam Hart, a few others, but that was also where I was first exposed to the art form of song parodies.

People that were a little nerdy in high school would look up to me and know it gets better.

About four or five months ago, at a dinner in New York, John made the very nice offer of my being guest editor for an issue of MAD and I thought about it for about half a nanosecond and decided that was a pretty good idea.

Now with internet culture it seems like everyone is doing music parodies. And they’re not all good!

My brothers and sisters hated me because I was an only child.

Not only are they just great, nice guys; they’re some of the best musicians you’re likely to find.

So then why get upset if somebody like me Tries to look at the world just a bit differently?

What kind of morons do you have working at newspapers in Austin that would base an entire review of an artist’s performance on whether or not they had a good seat?

In fact, when I come up with an idea for a parody I try to resist the urge to Google the idea to see if someone has done it already because the answer is almost always, “Yes, of course they have, they’ve thought of it!”

People say releasing an album is like giving birth, but it’s more like having a gallbladder operation.

I’m very analytical, I’m very precise.

I think that was the genesis of my polka medleys, because every rock song I played on the accordion just sounded like a polka and my friends thought it was funny.

Midget wrestling on channel 3, it costs me 50 bucks a month.

The big money is not in the buying and selling, but in the waiting.

It’s my responsibility to walk around the hotel with a big smile on my face and not worry about what’s happened in the last game.

I’m a big fan of old boots.

Don’t let small thinking cut your life down to size. Think big, aim high, act bold. And see just how big you can blow up your life.

To my younger self, I would say not to be so hard on yourself. I think that you are your biggest critic.

Whatever you are thinking, think bigger.

The biggest misconception about work is that you need to spend the majority of your time doing it.

The fishing is best where the fewest go. There is just less competition for bigger goals.