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Every night for dinner we had a big chunk of dirt.

Al Yankovic

Somebody will come up to me after a show and have me sign their arm, and the next time I see them my autograph has been permanently inscribed on their arm.
AL YANKOVIC

Arm Autograph Come Next Permanent Show Somebody Time Up
You can try on our suede underwear if you choose. Do what you want, but don’t step on my blue suede shoes.
AL YANKOVIC

Choose Our Shoe Step Suede Underwear Want
After that, I made the decision to headline no matter what, even if I was playing to seven people. I wanted people to be there to see me.
AL YANKOVIC

Decision Even Headline Made Matter People Play Seven Want
As much as people are griping about the Internet taking sales away from artists, it’s been a huge promotional tool for me.
AL YANKOVIC

Artist Grip Huge Much People Promotion Tool
I was a huge fan of ‘Mad’ magazine when I was 11, 12, 13 years old. I’d scour used bookstores trying to find back issues, and I’d wait at the newsstand for a new issue to come out. My life revolved around it.
AL YANKOVIC

Around Bookstore Fan Find Huge Issue Life Magazine Old Scour Revolve
I was abducted by some aliens from space who kind a looked like Jamie Farr.
AL YANKOVIC

Abuduct Fair Kind Look Space
I start with a comprehensive list of all the recent songs that have been big hits – and then I go down that list and see if I can come up with funny ideas for them. I can always come up with ideas, but not necessarily good ones!
AL YANKOVIC

Been Big Down Hit Idea List Recent Song
If money can’t buy happiness, then I guess I’ll have to rent it.
AL YANKOVIC

Buy Happiness Guess Money Rent Sassy
They somehow didn’t see the need for an accordion player. That’s when I realized that I had to find my own path in life.
AL YANKOVIC

According Life Need Own Path Player Realize Somehow
I suppose I had my rock star fantasies while I was singing into my hairbrush in the bathroom mirror, but I never really consciously said, ‘OK, this is what I’m going to do for a living and I’m going to be Weird Al.’
AL YANKOVIC

Bathroom Fantastic Go Hairbrush Live Mirror OK Rock Sing Star Suppose Weird
As a kid, I certainly never thought I would get to spend my life doing something fun.
AL YANKOVIC

Certain Do Fun Kid Something Spend Thought
I think that nerds, if you want to call them that, have only gotten more hip and assimilated into the culture.
AL YANKOVIC

Assimilate Call Culture Gotten More Nerd Think Want
As a wise man once said, “April Fools Day is for amateurs. You NEVER need an excuse to mess with people’s heads.”
AL YANKOVIC

April Day Excuse Fool Man never People Wise
There are a lot of songs that would ostensibly be a good candidate for parody, yet I can’t think of a clever enough idea.
AL YANKOVIC

Candidate Enough Good Idea Ostensibly Parody Song Think
If I could find the right kind of property, get tied in with the right movie, I’d love to be involved, but I just find it hard to be motivated to do another screenplay right now.
AL YANKOVIC

Another Find Involve Just Kind Motivate Movie Property Right Screenplay Tie
Velvet Elvis never puts on weight.
AL YANKOVIC

never Put Velvet Weight

Every night for dinner we had a big chunk of dirt.

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Every night for dinner we had a big chunk of dirt.

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