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It was difficult to get into my friends’ rock bands when I was a teenager.

Al Yankovic

I knew we were having problems when you put those piranhas in my bathtub again.
AL YANKOVIC

Again Bathtub Have Piranhas Problem Relationship
I’m always a little leery about doing shows where I’m not the headliner because when I first started playing in 1982 I opened for Missing Persons and got pelted for 45 minutes.
AL YANKOVIC

Always Decision Do Headline Leery Little Miss People Play Point Show Start
I write and write and write, and then I edit it down to the parts that I think are amusing, or that help the storyline, or I’ll write a notebook full of ideas of anecdotes or story points.
AL YANKOVIC

Amuse Down Edit Help Notebook Part Storyline Think Write
A lot of my cartoon voices are basically just variations on my natural voice.
AL YANKOVIC

Basic Cartoon Natural Variation Voice
Maybe I’ll make a huge color tapestry from my belly button lint.
AL YANKOVIC

Belly Button Color Huge Maybe Social Taboo
I’d rather clean all the bathrooms in Grand Central Station with my tongue than spend one more minute with you.
AL YANKOVIC

Bathroom Clean Grand Minute Spend Station Tongue
I suppose I had my rock star fantasies while I was singing into my hairbrush in the bathroom mirror, but I never really consciously said, ‘OK, this is what I’m going to do for a living and I’m going to be Weird Al.’
AL YANKOVIC

Bathroom Fantastic Go Hairbrush Live Mirror OK Rock Sing Star Suppose Weird
The music has always been my bread and butter, and I’ve focused more of my attention on that.
AL YANKOVIC

Always Attention Bread Butter Focus Music
So I try not to pick songs that I know would drive me crazy.
AL YANKOVIC

Crazy Drive Know Pick Song Try
I know now that everything I write, I’m going to put out, and I’ll have to live with it for the rest of my life.
AL YANKOVIC

Everything Go Life Live Now Out Rest Write
Left all my Beatle records out in the sun, got a coke bottle stuck on the end of my tongue.
AL YANKOVIC

Bottle Coke End Got Left Nestle Record Stuck Sun Tongue
If you want to avoid heated arguments, never discuss religion, politics, or whether the toilet paper roll should go over or under.
AL YANKOVIC

Avoid Discuss Heat Paper Political Politics Religion Toilet
What kind of morons do you have working at newspapers in Austin that would base an entire review of an artist’s performance on whether or not they had a good seat?
AL YANKOVIC

Artist Attention Austin Kind More Music
You can try on our suede underwear if you choose. Do what you want, but don’t step on my blue suede shoes.
AL YANKOVIC

Choose Our Shoe Step Suede Underwear Want
My wife went off with Elvis.
AL YANKOVIC

Off Went Wife
My velvet Elvis means the world to me. Although he may not be worth much dough, he means more to me than some old Rembrandt or Van Gogh.
AL YANKOVIC

Although Dough Mean Some Velvet World Worth

It was difficult to get into my friends’ rock bands when I was a teenager.

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It was difficult to get into my friends’ rock bands when I was a teenager.

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