I’m a bit of a shill for the Clinton Administration, which has its perks. I’m invited to all the inaugural balls.
AL FRANKENI know I have an awful lot to learn from the people of Minnesota.
More Al Franken Quotes
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Anyone with an Internet connection and a few dollars can obtain personal information they should never have access to, including a user’s date of birth, e-mail address, or estimated income.
AL FRANKEN -
The Freedom of Information Act doesn’t apply to Silicon Valley. And you can’t impeach Google if it breaks its ‘Don’t be evil’ campaign pledge.
AL FRANKEN -
I anticipate that Apple’s fingerprint reader will in fact make iPhone 5S owners more likely to secure their smartphones.
AL FRANKEN -
Medicare was established to secure that promise.
AL FRANKEN -
Well, I think that there’s a value to comedy in and of itself.
AL FRANKEN -
Demagoguery sells. And therefore, radio stations will put it on. But that doesn’t mean that you can’t do something else and also make it sell.
AL FRANKEN -
The government must give proper weight to both keeping America safe from terrorists and protecting Americans’ privacy.
AL FRANKEN -
He said we had enough to go three years without making money, and we had enough to go three weeks.
AL FRANKEN -
There is – I mean – I found early in life that righteous indignation is a little off-putting, and so I try to couch it with humor.
AL FRANKEN -
If someone hacks your password, you can change it – as many times as you want.
AL FRANKEN -
It’s not preppies, cause I’m a preppie myself. I just don’t like homosexuals. If you ask me, they’re all homosexuals in the Pudding. Hey, I was glad when that Pudding homosexual got killed in Philadelphia.
AL FRANKEN -
If Republicans eliminate Medicare, America will become a country in which you can never retire – and once you physically can no longer work, you are desperately poor until you die.
AL FRANKEN -
The Republican agenda is a radical vision in which Medicaid is slashed to the bone – in which we start to balance the budget on the backs of, literally, our most vulnerable citizens.
AL FRANKEN -
Anybody who deliberately propagandizes with lies should be held up to scorn and ridicule.
AL FRANKEN -
Today I will masterbate! Okay, that was a mistake. I should have written “Today I will masterbate–if I want to!
AL FRANKEN






