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Candy is dandy but liqueur is quicker.

Roald Dahl

Sex is like nose picking. It’s fine as long as you practice it yourself, but it’s disgusting watching someone else doing it.
ROALD DAHL

Disguise Humour Nose Practice Sex Watch Yourself
I cannot for the life of me understand why small children take so long to grow up. I think they do it deliberately, just to annoy me.
ROALD DAHL

Annoy Children Deliberate Grow Up Humour Understand
I doubt I would have written a line, unless some minor tragedy had sort of twisted my mind out of the normal rut.
ROALD DAHL

Mind Tragedy Twist Writer Writing
Unless you have been to boarding-school when you are very young, it is absolutely impossible to appreciate the delights of living at home.
ROALD DAHL

Absolute Appreciation Delight Home Impossible School Young
What a fortunate fellow I am, I kept telling myself. Nobody has ever had such a lovely time as this!
ROALD DAHL

Believe Fellow Fortunate Myself Positive Time
No book ever ends, when it’s full of your friends.
ROALD DAHL

Book Ending Friendship
The writer has to force himself to work. He has to make his own hours and if he doesn’t go to his desk at all there is nobody to scold him.
ROALD DAHL

Desk Force Himself Scold Writing
Somewhere inside all of us is the power to change the world.
ROALD DAHL

Business Change Inspirational Power World
Candy is dandy but liqueur is quicker.
ROALD DAHL

Alcohol Candy Humour One Liner Quick
Two hours of writing fiction leaves this writer completely drained. For those two hours he has been in a different place with totally different people.
ROALD DAHL

Different Drain Fiction Leaving People Place Writing
When you grow up and have children of your own, do please remember something important: a stodgy parent is no fun at all. What a child wants and deserves is a parent who is sparky.
ROALD DAHL

Children Deserve Grow Up Parents Remember Spark
The life of a writer is absolute hell compared to the life of a businessman.
ROALD DAHL

Absolute Businessman Comparison Life Writer
I have a passion for teaching kids to become readers, to become comfortable with a book, not daunted. Books shouldn’t be daunting, they should be funny, exciting and wonderful; and learning to be a reader gives a terrific advantage.
ROALD DAHL

Advantage Book Comfortable Excitement Kids Learning Passion Reading
Kindness – that simple word. To be kind – it covers everything, to my mind. If you’re kind that’s it.
ROALD DAHL

Courtesy Kindness Mind Positive
If the Good Lord intended for us to walk, he wouldn’t have invented rollar skates.
ROALD DAHL

Humour Intend Invention Lord Walk
It’s a funny thing about mothers and fathers. Even when their own child is the most disgusting little blister you could ever imagine, they still think that he or she is wonderful.
ROALD DAHL

Children Disguise Father Funny Imagination Mother Parents Wonderful

Candy is dandy but liqueur is quicker.

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Candy is dandy but liqueur is quicker.

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Popular Authors

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