“The writer walks out of his workroom in a daze. He wants a drink. He needs it.”

Though my father was Norwegian, he always wrote his diaries in perfect English.

A little magic can take you a long way.

When I first thought about writing the book Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, I never originally meant to have children in it at all!

There is no place I know that compares to pure imagination.

We have so much time and so little to do. Strike that, reverse it.

Sex is like nose picking. It’s fine as long as you practice it yourself, but it’s disgusting watching someone else doing it.

If you have good thoughts they will shine out of your face like sunbeams and you will always look lovely.

And above all, watch with glittering eyes the whole world around you because the greatest secrets are always hidden in the most unlikely places. Those who don’t believe in magic will never find it.

I was glad my father was an eye-smiler. It meant he never gave me a fake smile because it’s impossible to make your eyes twinkle if you aren’t feeling twinkly yourself.

There are a whole lot of things in this world of ours you haven’t started wondering about yet.

I don’t care if a reader hates one of my stories, just as long as he finishes the book.

It doesn’t matter who you are or what you look like, so long as somebody loves you.

You should never, never doubt something that no one is sure of.

Nowadays you can go anywhere in the world in a few hours, and nothing is fabulous any more.

If you are going to get anywhere in life you have to read a lot of books.

Grown ups are complicated creatures, full of quirks and secrets.

Always do sober what you said you’d do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.

There is truth in wine and children.

My lips got lost on the way to the kiss – that’s how drunk I was.

After I quit drinking, I realized I am the same asshole I always was; I just have fewer dents in my car.

A drunken man is happier than a sober one.

The worst disease which can afflict executives in their work is not, as popularly supposed, alcoholism; it’s egotism.

Sit, be still, and listen, because you’re drunk and we’re at the edge of the roof.

It’s true drinkin will kill ya, but if you’re drunk you don’t care.