“Sir one more comment like that and I will strangle you with my microphone wire!”

I think the reason I don’t read is because, when I’m reading, I feel like I’m missing out on something else. You know, What are my friends doing? Where’s my girlfriend?

I know I want to always do the best I can.

I grew up cursing a lot.

When you’re shooting a movie you are away from home most of the time. It’s an amazing thing that we get to do what we get to do, but you definitely are away from the family more than you’d like to be.

I finished a big book the other day. 421 pages. That’s a lot of coloring when you think about it.

I’ve always had lots of friends and my house was the house they all hung out at.

I was raised by a mother who told me I was great every day of my life.

I’m getting older, and it happens. You don’t care as much. I don’t care about too much anymore. I’ve got to think about that a little bit.

When I take my kid to school, all the parents stop and stare.

Alright, remember, alcohol equals puke equals smelly mess equals nobody likes you.

I don’t know what drives me to succeed. I know I want to always do the best I can. I never was like that as a kid.

Never seen my friends do more push-ups, trying to challenge Cruises’ manhood. It was like, I can be strong, too!

I did rocks, all this dumb stuff. But now it’s just trying to stay afloat and just get through the days.

The only reason I got into stand-up was because my brother told me to. I had no idea what I was going to do with my life. I was 17 and my brother went to a comedy club and he said – you can do that.

I don’t want to run around with new people. I feel safer with my friends.

I read to my kid, but I can’t stand reading.

I have tough skin. I don’t really read any of the comments unless they are positive. I don’t accept that much negativity in my life. It’s not an option.

I don’t look at negative comments because my parents and family don’t let me. My big sister controls my Instagram, and my big brother controls my Twitter. I also don’t really Google myself or anything like that.

A lady likes to be complimented on her looks, her eyes, her figure. But the personality comments are much appreciated.

When I initially read the script, it goes inside and comes out different things even without commenting on any stuff. And then, those pieces are taken out and then spread out through the movie.

There is an element of mystique to radio, and I often listen to cricket commentary on radio, especially when one is stuck in a traffic jam.

If you are overdressed, it is a comment on them. If you are under dressed, it is a comment on you.

A devastating commentary on the war in Iraq is that we have been unable to spend money on infrastructure.

I had to stop reading comments on blogs, they always tryna downplay yo accomplishments.