Why are my arms so weak? It’s like I did that push-up last year for nothing!
TINA FEYIn Washington, officials from the National Rifle Association met with a group of high school students. There were no survivors.
More Tina Fey Quotes
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I think someone should design exercise machines that reward people with sex at the end of their workouts, because people will perform superhuman feats for even the faint hope of that.
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So, my unsolicited advice to women in the workplace is this. When faced with sexism, or ageism, or lookism, or even really aggressive Buddhism, ask yourself the following question: “Is this person in between me and what I want to do?”
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You can’t control things by being nervous.
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It is an impressively arrogant move to conclude that just because you don’t like something, it is empirically not good. I don’t like Chinese food, but I don’t write articles trying to prove it doesn’t exist.
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If you want to be a screenwriter, take an acting class to get a sense of what you’re asking actors to do. Learning other skills will help you communicate with people and respect what they do.
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In order to feel safer on his private jet, actor John Travolta has purchased a bomb-sniffing dog. Unfortunately for the actor, the dog came six movies too late.
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Do your thing and don’t care if they like it.
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Life is improvisation.
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It’s the same reason I don’t get Hooters. Why do we need to enjoy chicken wings and boobies at the same time? Yes, they are a natural and beautiful part of the human experience. And so are boobies. But why at the same time?
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MAKE STATEMENTS also applies to us women: Speak in statements instead of apologetic questions. No one wants to go to a doctor who says, “I’m going to be your surgeon? I’m here to talk to you about your procedure?
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In Washington, officials from the National Rifle Association met with a group of high school students. There were no survivors.
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Sometimes you want to have a very productive Saturday to feel that you are in control of your life, which of course you are not.
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An interim government was set up in Afghanistan. It included two women, one of whom was Minister of Women’s Affairs. Man, who’d she have to show here ankles to to get that job?
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To say I’m an overrated troll, when you have never even seen me guard a bridge, is patently unfair.
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You can’t be that kid standing at the top of the waterslide, overthinking it. You have to go down the chute.
TINA FEY