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1. black
2. grey
3. blue
4. red
5. brown
6. white

It’s not easy to take a sit-com and turn it into a feature.

Rowan Atkinson

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  I think you’re bound to get a sense of any character that you play. It’s not something you often do in comedy.

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  Your services might be as useful as a barbershop on the steps of a guillotine.

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  The older you get, the more you realise how happenstance has helped to determine your path through life.

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  People think because I can make them laugh on the stage, I’ll be able to make them laugh in person. That isn’t the case at all. I am essentially a rather quiet, dull person who just happens to be a performer.

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  I’m as poor as a church mouse, that’s just had an enormous tax bill on the very day his wife ran off with another mouse, taking all the cheese.

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  For telling a good and incisive religious joke, you should be praised. For telling a bad one, you should be ridiculed and reviled. The idea that you could be prosecuted for the telling of either is quite fantastic.

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  I’m not looking for anything other than an interesting role to play.

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  I would never wish to say that I’ve finally waved goodbye to any character, it’s just that the emphasis tends to shift.

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  I’m not a naturally funny man. I find that I can only be funny, if I become someone else.

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  My personal problem is that I take the business of film-making so seriously that I find it very difficult to relax.

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  I would never be a television presenter. It’s not something I could ever do.

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  If you get the quality right, then the marketability or whatever; your ability to sell videos or your ability to earn money or whatever, will follow naturally.

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  You’re about as useful as a one-legged man at an arse kicking contest.

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  I have to say that I’ve always believed perfectionism is more of a disease than a quality. I do try to go with the flow but I can’t let go.

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