Ask yourself, if there was to be no blame, and if there was to be no praise, who would I be then?
QUENTIN CRISPNever get involved with someone who wants to change you
More Quentin Crisp Quotes
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Manners are love in a cool climate.
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You don’t have to deal with anyone in America. They accept you the way you are.
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I never spend my time doing anything I’ll have to do again tomorrow.
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Masturbation is not only an expression of self-regard: it is also the natural emotional outlet of those who…have already accepted as inevitable the wide gulf between their real futures and the expectations of their fantasies.
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What my parents thought of this, I don’t know. But they bore it. And the real problem was not my sin, but my unemployability.
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The measure of woman’s distaste for any part of her life lies not in the loudness of her lamentations (these are only an attempt to buy a martyr’s crown at a reduced price) but in her persistent pursuit of that occupation of which she never ceases to complain.
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Fashion is a way of not having to decide who you are. Style is deciding who you are and being able to perpetuate it.
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In an expanding universe, time is on the side of the outcast. Those who once inhabited the suburbs of human contempt find that without changing their address they eventually live in the metropolis.
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I recommend limiting one’s involvement in other people’s lives to a pleasantly scant minimum. This may seem too stoical a position in these madly passionate times, but madly passionate people rarely make good on their madly passionate promises.
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Never keep up with the Joneses. Drag them down to your level.
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Nothing more rapidly inclines a person to go into a monastery than reading a book on etiquette. There are so many trivial ways in which it is possible to commit some social sin.
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The war between the sexes is the only one in which both sides regularly sleep with the enemy.
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Men get laid, but women get screwed.
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I like living in one room and have never known what people do with the room they are not in.
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I would have run all the way and I would have gone up to the largest and leatheriest of the denizens and said: If you truly love me, kill the bartender.
QUENTIN CRISP