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If a man were to look over the fence on one side of his garden and observe that the neighbor on his left had laid his garden path round a central lawn; and were to look over the fence on the other side of his garden and observe that the neighbor on his right had laid his path down the middle of the lawn.

Quentin Crisp

I was amazed to receive later a substantial sum for sitting in my room and talking about myself. If only I could get some of the back pay!
QUENTIN CRISP

Amaze Back Later Myself Pay Recieve Sitting Som Substantial Sum Talk
There is no need to do any housework at all. After the first four years the dirt doesn’t get any worse.
QUENTIN CRISP

At All Housework Need To Do
Sex is the last refuge of the miserable.
QUENTIN CRISP

Last Miserable Refuge Sex
Fashion is not style. Nay, we can say more: Fashion is instead of style. Style is an idiom springing spontaneously from the personality but deliberately maintained.
QUENTIN CRISP

Deliberate Fashion Idiom Instead Maintain Personality Spontaneously Style
Happiness is the only thing I understand.
QUENTIN CRISP

Happiness One Liner Only Thing Understand
I would have run all the way and I would have gone up to the largest and leatheriest of the denizens and said: If you truly love me, kill the bartender.
QUENTIN CRISP

Bartender Leather Love Run Would Gone
I had a friend who had two degrees of being made up: when invited I would say ‘Can I make up?’ and he would say ‘Oh yes – tinted?’, or he would say, ‘Oh yes – clotted?’
QUENTIN CRISP

Being Friend Invite Limited Made Yes
In Manhattan, every flat surface is a potential stage and every inattentive waiter an unemployed, possibly unemployable, actor.
QUENTIN CRISP

Actor Country Every Evry Flat Inattentive Possibly Potential Stage Surface Unemoloy Waiter
I don’t really act. I say the words the way I would say them if I meant them.
QUENTIN CRISP

Act Meant Really Say Them Word Would
The war between the sexes is the only one in which both sides regularly sleep with the enemy.
QUENTIN CRISP

Between Both Enemy One Only Regularly Sex Side Sleep War Which
Look inward and ask not if there is anything outside you want, but whether there is anything inside that you have not yet unpacked.
QUENTIN CRISP

Anything Ask Inside Look Outside Unpack
It’s a strange situation, but people will pay your fare to get you to go and tell them how to be happy.
QUENTIN CRISP

Build Fare Happy Pay Situation Strange Tell
The poverty from which I have suffered could be diagnosed as ‘Soho’ poverty. It comes from having the airs and graces of a genius and no talent.
QUENTIN CRISP

Air Come Diagnosed Genius Grace Have Poverty Soho Suffer
I’m happy to say she was laughing while she said it, but she meant it. I’ve never learned to be a candle burning in an empty room. So I go on the screen, and I say whatever I’m told to say.
QUENTIN CRISP

Burn Empty Happy Say Laugh Learn Meant Room Said Told
Manners are love in a cool climate.
QUENTIN CRISP

Climate Cool Love Manner
It is explained that all relationships require a little give and take. This is untrue. Any partnership demands that we give and give and give and at the last, as we flop into our graves exhausted, we are told that we didn’t give enough.
QUENTIN CRISP

All Explain Give Little Relationship Require Take Untrue

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