“There were many times my pants were so thin I could sit on a dime and tell if it was heads or tails.”

We are so fond on one another because our ailments are the same.

Everyone desires long life, not one old age.

Don’t set your wit against a child.

Many a truth is told in jest.

For to enter the palace of learning at the great gate requires an expense of time and forms, therefore men of much haste and little ceremony are content to get in by the back-door.

Perverseness is your whole defence.

Satire is a sort of glass, wherein beholders do generally discover everybody’s face but their own.

The bulk of mankind is as well equipped for flying as thinking.

Power is no blessing in itself, except when it is used to protect the innocent.

Although the devil be the father of lies, he seems, like other great inventors, to have lost much of his reputation by the continual improvements that have been made upon him.

We of this age have discovered a shorter, and more prudent method to become scholars and wits, without the fatigue of reading or of thinking.

You should never be ashamed to admit you have been wrong. It only proves you are wiser today than yesterday.

If Heaven had looked upon riches to be a valuable thing, it would not have given them to such a scoundrel.

Cruel people are ever cowards in emergency.

Books, the children of the brain.

Party is the madness of many for the gain of a few.

Your clothes should be tight enough to show you’re a woman but loose enough to show you’re a lady

A good speech should be like a woman’s skirt: long enough to cover the subject and short enough to create interest.

Man makes his own history, but he does not make it out of the whole cloth; he does not make it out of conditions chosen by himself, but out of such as he finds close at hand.

I am not really single, I am dating my self , I take my self out to eat, I buy myself clothes, I love me, I’m awesome.

I say, beware of all enterprises that require new clothes, and not rather a new wearer of clothes.

I wanted to give a woman comfortable clothes that would flow with her body. A woman is closest to being naked when she is well-dressed.

You don’t love someone for their looks, or their clothes, or for their fancy car, but because they sing a song only you can hear.

I think women are sexy when they got some clothes on. And if later they take them off then you’ve triumphed.