“I am heaven.”

Life is an ordeal, albeit an exciting one, but I wouldn’t trade it for the good old days of poverty and obscurity.

One of the most corrosive threats to society moving forward is social media and right wing disinformation.

I used to be a guy who was experiencing the Universe, but now I feel like the Universe experiencing a guy.

Energy is what I believe all of us are. We’re just conscious awareness dancing for itself for no other reason but to stay amused.

I don’t make it in regular channels, and that’s okay for me.

Comedy is a high form of art becaus it brings us more joy than anything else.

My life is not unlike Truman’s. I can’t go anywhere.

I think everybody should get rich and famous and do everything they ever dreamed of so they can see that it’s not the answer.

My focus is to forget the pain of life. Forget the pain, mock the pain, reduce it. And laugh.

Beware of the unloved, because they will eventually hurt themselves or others.

I have no limits. I cannot be contained because I am the container.

I got a lot of support from my parents. That’s the one thing I always appreciated. They didn’t tell me I was being stupid; they told me I was being funny.

My report card always said, ‘Jim finishes first and then disrupts the other students’.

I don’t remember yesterday. I pretty much live in the moment.

If I’m not back in 5 minutes, just wait longer.

Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.

Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother.

Speak but little, and that little only when thy own purposes require it. Heaven has given thee two ears but only one tongue, which means: listen to two things, but be not the first to propose one.

I tell you the truth, it is hard for a rich man to enter the kingdom of heaven. Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of heaven.

It is written on the gate of heaven: Nothing in existence is more powerful than destiny. And destiny brought you here, to this page, which is part of your ticket-as all things are-to return to God.

Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.

The return from your work must be the satisfaction which that work brings you and the world’s need of that work. With this, life is heaven, or as near heaven as you can get. Without this – with work which you despise, which bores you, and which the world does not need – this life is hell.

If the earth is fit for laughter then surely heaven is filled with it. Heaven is the birthplace of laughter.