black
grey
blue
red
brown
white

A circus! 100 clowns of injustice have climbed out of the tiny clown car of this court room.

Ellen DeGeneres

People give me such a hard time because I don’t wear dresses. What’s that got to do with anything?
ELLEN DEGENERES

Giving Hard People Times
I’m on the patch right now. Where it releases small dosages of approval until I no longer crave it, and then I’m gonna rip it off.
ELLEN DEGENERES

Funny Humor Rip
Be kind to one another. Bye, bye.
ELLEN DEGENERES

Another Bye Kind People
Why is it that when you wipe up dust its called dusting but when you wipe up a spill its not called spilling? Just something to think about.
ELLEN DEGENERES

Called Dust Something Thinking Wipe
There’s always time to do things that you’re passionate about. … If my name helps get something out there that I believe in then I am going to produce it. … Design is really my true love.
ELLEN DEGENERES

Believe Design Names Something
I have a great career, and I have wonderful fans who really are supportive and loyal – because I’m not hiding anything from them.
ELLEN DEGENERES

Careers Fans Supportive
One rough patch is not the big picture.
ELLEN DEGENERES

Patch Picture Rough
I’m sure there’s somebody out there who doesn’t like Betty White because she’s short and has white hair.
ELLEN DEGENERES

Hair Somebody White
I admire people who know they can’t sing. There are so many people out there who can’t sing, but they think they can, so they sing a lot.
ELLEN DEGENERES

Admire People Thinking
Stuffed deer heads on walls are bad enough, but it’s worse when you see them wearing dark glasses, having streamers around their necks and a hat on their antlers. Because then you know they were enjoying themselves at a party when they were shot.
ELLEN DEGENERES

Funny Party Streamers Wall
All the commercials on TV today are for antidepressants, for Prozac or Paxil. And they get you right away. “Are you sad? Do you get stressed, do you have anxiety?” “Yes, I have all those things! I’m alive!”
ELLEN DEGENERES

Anxiety Funny Humor
Yeah I’m thirty-six, but on the show I’m thirty-two. Nobody wants to watch a thirty-six year old woman, so they decided to make me thirty-two. Much more appealing somehow.
ELLEN DEGENERES

Fake People Reality Years
So excited for the Apple Watch. For centuries, we’ve checked the time by looking at our phones. Having it on your wrist? Genius.
ELLEN DEGENERES

Phone Reality Technology
I don’t want to get the same looks I give people when they get on a plane holding a baby: “That’s a cute baby, just keep walking, keep walking, keep going, keep going.
ELLEN DEGENERES

Baby Cute Funny
My dog of 17 years just died. Oh you’re kidding?… Noooo… as funny as that is, I’m not
ELLEN DEGENERES

Dog Funny Humor
I just like observing people – it’s something I’ve done ever since I was a kid, and I got really good at it. That’s a big part of why I became a comedian. My audience is filled with every kind of person you can imagine, and I love that.
ELLEN DEGENERES

Comedians Kids People

A circus! 100 clowns of injustice have climbed out of the tiny clown car of this court room.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

A circus! 100 clowns of injustice have climbed out of the tiny clown car of this court room.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More Ellen DeGeneres Quotes