The only good thing about the good old days is they’re gone.
DICK GREGORYThe only good thing about the good old days is they’re gone.
DICK GREGORYI never learned hate at home, or shame. I had to go to school for that.
DICK GREGORYIf all you can do is judge a person by their appearance because you don’t have the spirit to judge someone from within, you’re in trouble.
DICK GREGORYHome was a place to be only when all other places were closed.
DICK GREGORYPoor is a state of mind you never grow out of, but being broke is just a temporary condition.
DICK GREGORYYou hear entertainers all the time, saying, ‘If I couldn’t get paid for this, I’d do it for free.’ When’s the last time you ever heard a business person say, ‘If I couldn’t get paid for being chairman of British Petroleum, I’d do it for free?’
DICK GREGORYPolitical promises are much like marriage vows. They are made at the beginning of the relationship between candidate and voter, but are quickly forgotten.
DICK GREGORYI personally believe breathatarianism to be the highest mode of human living breathing in pure air, absorbing the direct light and energies of the sun, bathing in pure water I look at the obituaries every morning and ain’t nobody listed but you eaters.
DICK GREGORYI never believed in Santa Claus because I knew no white dude would come into my neighborhood after dark.
DICK GREGORYPolitical promises are much like marriage vows. They are made at the beginning of the relationship between candidate and voter, but are quickly forgotten.
DICK GREGORYHell hath no fury like a liberal scorned.
DICK GREGORYYou know why Madison Avenue advertising has never done well in Harlem? We’re the only ones who know what it means to be Brand X.
DICK GREGORYWhen you shoot right and truth and justice down, the more right and truth and justice will rise up.
DICK GREGORYYou know, I always say white is not a color, white is an attitude, and if you haven’t got trillions of dollars in the bank that you don’t need, you can’t be white.
DICK GREGORYNo kid in the world, no woman in the world should ever raise a hand against a no-good daddy. That’s already been taken care of: A Man Who Destroys His Own Home Shall Inherit the Wind.
DICK GREGORYOnce I realized the value of making people laugh, I got very good at it. Fast.
DICK GREGORY