Last time I was down South I walked into this restaurant, and this white waitress came up to me and said: ‘We don’t serve colored people here.’ I said: ‘that’s all right, I don’t eat colored people. Bring me a whole fried chicken.
DICK GREGORYPeople with high blood pressure, diabetes – those are conditions brought about by lifestyle. If you change the lifestyle, those conditions will leave.
More Dick Gregory Quotes
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To me, seeing a really great comedian is a bit like watching a musician or a poet.
DICK GREGORY -
I used to get letters saying, ‘I didn’t know black children and white children were the same.’
DICK GREGORY -
Riches do not delight us so much with their possession, as torment us with their loss.
DICK GREGORY -
Poor is a state of mind you never grow out of, but being broke is just a temporary condition.
DICK GREGORY -
Political promises are much like marriage vows. They are made at the beginning of the relationship between candidate and voter, but are quickly forgotten.
DICK GREGORY -
If democracy is such a good thing, let’s have more of it.
DICK GREGORY -
You know why Madison Avenue advertising has never done well in Harlem? We’re the only ones who know what it means to be Brand X.
DICK GREGORY -
Home was a place to be only when all other places were closed.
DICK GREGORY -
When you have a good mother and no father, God kind of sits in. It’s not enough, but it helps.
DICK GREGORY -
You know, I always say white is not a color, white is an attitude, and if you haven’t got trillions of dollars in the bank that you don’t need, you can’t be white.
DICK GREGORY -
Being white is a job in America. You take that away, you better get the soldiers out.
DICK GREGORY -
Did you know that in New Orleans they still have brown bag parties? What’s that, you ask? You and I go to a party, and when we get to the door, there’s a brown bag hanging down from the ceiling, and if our skin is darker than the brown bag, we can’t go in.
DICK GREGORY -
When I lost my rifle, the Army charged me 85 dollars. That is why in the Navy the Captain goes down with the ship.
DICK GREGORY -
Revolution ain’t nothing but an extent of evolution; Evolution is a fact of nature.
DICK GREGORY -
When I go through the airport and see white women walking through the airport barefooted, like athlete’s feet don’t exist, there’s something wrong.
DICK GREGORY







