Ralph Nader has slavery reparations on his platform, which makes me think he’s not serious. If he thought he could win he wouldn’t even say that.
DAVE CHAPPELLEIf I can make a teacher’s salary doing comedy, I think that’s better than being a teacher.
More Dave Chappelle Quotes
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I have all these weird fantasies. Going coast-to-coast on my motorcycle and having random barbecues all over America. No show, no nothing.
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It seems like there’s never enough famous white people among comic in Hollywood.
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I enjoy my own thoughts sometimes.
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I got a lot of positive people around me.
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I don’t normally talk about my religion publicly because I don’t want people to associate me and my flaws with this beautiful thing. And I believe it is beautiful religion if you learn it the right way.
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They do what they do for money – that’s all. I don’t even know why you’re listening to me. I’ve done commercials for both Coke and Pepsi. Truth is, I can’t even taste the difference, but Pepsi paid me last, so there it is.
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I always take a relationship to the next level. If that works out, I take it to the next level after that, until I finally reach that level when it becomes absolutely necessary for me to leave.
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Something about New York, man: You can do more comedy there probably than you can anywhere in the world. If you’re interested in being funny, New York is the place to go.
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I don’t want the money. I don’t want the drama. I just want to do my show. I want to have fun again.
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I started when I was 14. I figured out that’s what I wanted to do when I was 14. Even when I was six, I can remember people telling me, “You’re gonna be a comedian,” and all this stuff.
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I care about the work I do. But I’m not going to say that money’s not an issue.
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Constantly take inventory of what’s important to you.
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When I’m on stage, I get real happy there. Maybe that’s the only time in my adult life I feel like myself.
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I support anyone’s right to be who they want to be. My question is: to what extent do I have to participate in your self-image?
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I think every group of black guys should have at least one white guy in it.
DAVE CHAPPELLE