If I make a joke about black people or Asian people or whatever, and then an Asian comes up to me afterwards and says, “That joke offended me,” I’m still more or less not going to listen, but at least it makes sense, like I said something that was about them.
BRAD WILLIAMSI’m in awe of comics that do things that I can’t do, or haven’t tried doing yet.
More Brad Williams Quotes
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There are plenty of wonderful, good fat people in the USA that have no problems being fat, who I have no problems with being fat.
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If you got a hit every third time that you went up to bat in the major leagues, you’d be the greatest hitter of all time. I think my average is a little better than that.
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I want to go to Australia so bad, do comedy there, and see the people there. It’s a great country. I have friends that are Australian that have told me all about it. I want to do comedy there.
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That is the most confusing and insane thing to me, when people get offended on behalf of another group.
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It’s extremely important for people to be informed and to be educated and to know what’s going in their community and in their country, but every now and then you just kind of want to turn the brain off for a little bit and just laugh and be silly.
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I’m in awe of comedians that do things that I can’t do, whether it be a one-liner comic like Anthony Jeselnik, whether it be social issues commentary, whether it be – hell, Carrot Top. I can’t be Carrot Top. I can’t.
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I don’t take too many things too seriously.
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It’s weird when people ask me, “Why are you so nice?” It’s like, “Because that’s just what you should do. You should be kind to people.” It seems really basic, but it’s amazing how many people forget that.
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I hate that when people are like, “Well, all dwarves know each other, right?” And you want to get mad, but you can’t because we do.
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I try not to be hateful.
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When a soldier of the night’s watch dies they say, “And now his watch is over.” That’s what they say when a comedian dies. They go, “And now his tour is done.”
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Comedian makes the statement that just isn’t true.
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I’m funny because I’m funny. And there’s more to offer.
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Every now and then we’re going to fail.
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Everyone just wants to hear the exact jokes that apply to them and want to – everyone wants a perfectly crafted joke for them.
BRAD WILLIAMS