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Can I say anything good about Ken Livingstone? A long time ago he did some good things, but I can’t now remember what any of them were.

Boris Johnson

The next Tory leader would have to unify his party and ensure that Britain stood tall in the world.
BORIS JOHNSON

Leader Party World
David Lloyd George had been to Germany, and been so dazzled by the Führer that he compared him to George Washington. Hitler was a ‘born leader’, declared the befuddled former British Prime Minister.
BORIS JOHNSON

Country Hero War
I want you to know that I have nothing against Orlando, though you are, of course, far more likely to get shot or robbed there than in London.
BORIS JOHNSON

Enemy Myself Rival
We need to look at our nannying, mollycoddled, politically correct culture in my view, which stops kids from going out and playing competitive sport. I also think we need to look at the shear fatness of the regulations which control people who want to help kids play sport.
BORIS JOHNSON

Football Soccer Sports
If gay marriage was OK … then I saw no reason in principle why a union should not be consecrated between three men, as well as two men; or indeed three men and a dog.
BORIS JOHNSON

Dog Man Marriage Principle Relationship
Some people play the piano, some do Sudoku, some watch television, some people go out to dinner parties. I write books.
BORIS JOHNSON

Book People Play Watch
I want London to be a competitive, dynamic place to come to work.
BORIS JOHNSON

Country Place Want Work
I cant remember what my line on drugs is. Whats my line on drugs?
BORIS JOHNSON

Drugs Line Myself
Never in my life did I think I would be congratulated by Mick Jagger for achieving anything.
BORIS JOHNSON

Achieve Congratulations Thinking
Our friends in America will be at the front of the queue for trade deals.
BORIS JOHNSON

Deal Friendship Queue Trade
Can I say anything good about Ken Livingstone? A long time ago he did some good things, but I can’t now remember what any of them were.
BORIS JOHNSON

Goodness Myself Remember Talk
It is easy to make promises – it is hard work to keep them.
BORIS JOHNSON

Easy Hard Promise Work
I am supporting David Cameron purely out of cynical self-interest.
BORIS JOHNSON

Cynical Interest Self
My ideal world is, we’re there, we’re in the EU, trying to make it better.
BORIS JOHNSON

Ideals Trying World
If we judged everybody by the stupid, unguarded things they blurt out to their nearest and dearest, then we wouldn’t ever get anywhere.
BORIS JOHNSON

Guard Judgment Stupidity
The Geiger-counter of Olympomania is going to go zoink off the scale.
BORIS JOHNSON

Country Olympics People Scales
My chances of being PM are about as good as the chances of finding Elvis on Mars, or my being reincarnated as an olive.
BORIS JOHNSON

Chance Myself Opportunity
He is the resounding human rebuttal to all Marxist historians who think history is the story of vast and impersonal economic forces. The point of the Churchill Factor is that one man can make all the difference.
BORIS JOHNSON

Difference History Human Man Oneself Thinking Vast
It hasn’t taken them long, they began by telling us they would have a positive and patriotic case and they’re back to project fear within minutes. There they go again they have nothing positive to say.
BORIS JOHNSON

Beginning Fear Positive Talk
The Lib Dems are not just empty. They are a void within a vacuum surrounded by a vast inanition.
BORIS JOHNSON

Empty Surround Vast
I lead a life of blameless domesticity and always have done.
BORIS JOHNSON

Blame Leadership Life Myself
London is the sporting capital of the world. I say to the Chinese and I say to the world, ping pong is coming home.
BORIS JOHNSON

Country Home Ping Pong
Nothing excites compassion, in friend and foe alike, as much as the sight of you ker-splonked on the Tarmac with your propeller buried six feet under.
BORIS JOHNSON

Compassion Feet Sight
You know, sometimes I don’t understand what’s wrong with us. This is just about the most creative and imaginative country on earth—and yet sometimes we just don’t seem to have the gumption to exploit our intellectual property.
BORIS JOHNSON

Country Hands Jet/ Engines
I am supporting David Cameron purely out of cynical self-interest.
BORIS JOHNSON

Interest Myself Pure Support
I’m no communist. I’m a tax cutting Conservative. But I want a capitalism that is fairer to forgotten people.
BORIS JOHNSON

Communism Conservatism Forget People Tax
It is said that the Queen has come to love the Commonwealth, partly because it supplies her with regular cheering crowds of flag-waving picaninnies; and one can imagine that Blair, twice victor abroad but enmired at home, is similarly seduced by foreign politeness.
BORIS JOHNSON

Cheer Fall Queens

Can I say anything good about Ken Livingstone? A long time ago he did some good things, but I can’t now remember what any of them were.

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Can I say anything good about Ken Livingstone? A long time ago he did some good things, but I can’t now remember what any of them were.

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