My chances of being PM are about as good as the chances of finding Elvis on Mars, or my being reincarnated as an olive.
BORIS JOHNSONNever in my life did I think I would be congratulated by Mick Jagger for achieving anything.
More Boris Johnson Quotes
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I think I was once given cocaine but I sneezed so it didn’t go up my nose. In fact, it may have been icing sugar.
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We need to look at our nannying, mollycoddled, politically correct culture in my view, which stops kids from going out and playing competitive sport. I also think we need to look at the shear fatness of the regulations which control people who want to help kids play sport.
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London is a fantastic creator of jobs – but many of these jobs are going to people who don’t originate in this country.
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This is not a time to quail, it is not a crisis, nor should we see it as an excuse for wobbling or self-doubt. But it is a moment for hope…
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Voting Tory will cause your wife to have bigger breasts and increase your chances of owning a BMW M3.
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Nothing excites compassion, in friend and foe alike, as much as the sight of you ker-splonked on the Tarmac with your propeller buried six feet under.
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Yes, cannabis is dangerous, but no more than other perfectly legal drugs. It’s time for a rethink, and the Tory party – the funkiest, most jiving party on Earth – is where it’s happening.
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It is easy to make promises – it is hard work to keep them.
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If we judged everybody by the stupid, unguarded things they blurt out to their nearest and dearest, then we wouldn’t ever get anywhere.
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David Lloyd George had been to Germany, and been so dazzled by the Führer that he compared him to George Washington. Hitler was a ‘born leader’, declared the befuddled former British Prime Minister.
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It hasn’t taken them long, they began by telling us they would have a positive and patriotic case and they’re back to project fear within minutes. There they go again they have nothing positive to say.
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Dark forces dragged me away from the keyboard, swirling forces of irresistible intensity and power.
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I think the risks that people see of terrorism are incredibly important but we are very confident we have got the right people on it and the risks have been minimised.
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The Geiger-counter of Olympomania is going to go zoink off the scale.
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We did everything we could to break down barriers that restrain poorest.
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