Go on, try weasel, try squirrel; it tastes like chicken, it tastes just like chicken! If it tastes just like chicken, why don’t you gimme some damn chicken?
BOBCAT GOLDTHWAITWe don’t really become worm food. We go to a magical place with bunnies and rainbows.”
More Bobcat Goldthwait Quotes
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Stand-up was interesting to me at the beginning, because I was trying to parody it. My early stand-up was really Andy Kaufman-esque, and then I became the very thing I was making fun of.
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Don’t hoo, hoo, hoo me. There’s a fine line between hoo, hoo, hoo and hiel, hiel, hiel.
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In fact, with Michael Jackson, I think those mourning people… They aren’t even waking Michael, they’re waking the Michael Jackson of ’84.
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Without getting too profound, I’m pretty sure that’s where the invention of the afterlife comes from. “
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If you ever see me at a boat show or at a car show, blow my head off.
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When I was a baby I had no teeth. I couldn’t get a job and I couldn’t eat meat.
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I lost my job, well I didn’t lose it, I know where it is, there’s just some other guy doing it now.
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In my first stand-up acts there wasn’t material even. You know, I’d go on stage and cry and read a Dear John letter or gut fish on stage. I could be odd – and it’s what interested me as a comedian.
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Quit everything until you find something that you just cannot quit.
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Fame is like a big eraser. It’s strange, now that I’m famous. In my parents’ opinion, all the shitty things – all the wreckage of my past – is erased.
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Kurt (Cobain) was a fan of my standup, which was pretty weird.
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We don’t really become worm food. We go to a magical place with bunnies and rainbows.”
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They never were given a chance to give their respects to the death of the guy they loved back in ’84.
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That’s human nature – we want to completely rewrite history so it can be comfortable.
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I can smell parents’ stomach acid right now, but they know that whole “You gotta get a job and you gotta settle for what people perceive as success” thing is really absurd.
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