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Alcohol is really just the liquid version of Photoshop.

Bill Murray

You know…they say an elephant never forgets. What they don’t tell you is, you never forget an elephant.
BILL MURRAY

Elephants Forget never
The truth is, anybody that becomes famous is an ass for a year and a half. You’ve got to give them a year and a half, two years.
BILL MURRAY

Ass Famous Giving Two Years
Disneyland. The world’s biggest people trap, built by a mouse.
BILL MURRAY

People Traps World
Movie acting suits me because I only need to be good for ninety seconds at a time.
BILL MURRAY

Acting Needs Suits
Now, for some of you it doesn’t matter. You were born rich and you’re going to stay rich. But here’s my advice to the rest of you.
BILL MURRAY

Advice Boys Matter Some
Every moment that you share someone else’s pain, feel what they feel, makes you more human.
BILL MURRAY

Moments Pain Share
Human sacrifice! Dogs and cats living together! Mass hysteria!
BILL MURRAY

Cat Dog Sacrifice
We still have to put some cherry syrup on it, and then we can eat it
BILL MURRAY

Cherries Ice Cream Syrup
I’m over the Oscar thing. I feel that if you really want an Oscar, you’re in trouble. It’s like wanting to be married – you’ll take anybody. If you want the Oscar really badly, it becomes a naked desire and ambition. It becomes very unattractive. I’ve seen it.
BILL MURRAY

Acting Ambition Desire
When I was a little kid playing baseball, my manager called me Sleepy. And only a few people, who know me from way, way back, call me that still. I used to drift off and that’s why they made me the catcher, so I wouldn’t fall asleep. That gift I have still.
BILL MURRAY

Baseball Fall Kids
People usually go through a bad period when they first get successful. You’re new and you’re hot and things go wrong.
BILL MURRAY

Hot People Successful
You’re supposed to have one hand up and one hand down. As you’re trying to going up, you’re trying to pull someone up at the same time.
BILL MURRAY

Hands Suppose Trying
Chicks dig me because I rarely wear underwear, and when I do, it’s usually something unusual.
BILL MURRAY

Stripes Underwear Unusual
And when I told my sons I might be in City of Ember, they said, ‘Oh! You’re gonna be the mayor?’ And I hadn’t even read the script yet.
BILL MURRAY

Cities might Son
I don’t want to be that guy mumbling into his drink at a bar.
BILL MURRAY

Bars Guy Want
I don’t answer fan mail. I don’t have time for that. It’s like hundreds of thousands of people who think they’re going to become millionaires getting autographs from movie actors. I don’t have time for those idiots. I’ve got stuff to do.
BILL MURRAY

Fans People Thinking

Alcohol is really just the liquid version of Photoshop.

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Alcohol is really just the liquid version of Photoshop.

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