I was in the Virgin Islands once. I met a girl. We ate lobster, drank piña coladas. At sunset, we made love like sea otters. That was a pretty good day. Why couldn’t I get that day over and over and over?
BILL MURRAYI’m a nut, but not just a nut.
More Bill Murray Quotes
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I’d like [Santa Claus] to give Wes Anderson, the director, enough money in his next budget for an aerial shot – just a little copter shot. He really wanted this one helicopter shot, and Disney wouldn’t give him the money. Just wouldn’t give him the money.
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I mean, everybody would love to have their clothes torn off by a mob of girls, but being screamed at is different.
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When you see grown men near to tears because they’ve missed hitting a little white ball into a hole from three feet, it makes you laugh.
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You know the theory of cell irritability? If you take an amoeba cell and poke it a thousand times, it will change and then re-form into its original shape. And then, the thousandth time you poke this amoeba.
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Different vodkas have different effects. Some make you feel a little… poly-lingual. Some make you feel like you want to talk back to someone who’s giving you a hard time. Some make you feel like lifting kettle bells.
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I don’t want to be that guy mumbling into his drink at a bar.
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I don’t know what my fans are going to think. It’s definitely not what they’re used to from me.
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Those are my people, you know? The ones who are going to crash and burn.
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Why would you get up there and bore people? I never have figured that out. These people are supposedly in the entertainment industry, and they finally get up there to that podium and they become the most boring people in the world.
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People say I’m difficult and sometimes that’s a badge of honour.
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I’d sort of gone through some sort of spiritual change in the late 70s where I sort of saw there was some other life to live. It changed the way that I worked just having a different presence and a different tension.
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I don’t answer fan mail. I don’t have time for that. It’s like hundreds of thousands of people who think they’re going to become millionaires getting autographs from movie actors. I don’t have time for those idiots. I’ve got stuff to do.
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You say, “Do you want a piece of this movie?” And he’s got to sell this movie to get his money back. That’s the brains of it; that’s the genius of this financing. “You want Germany? Give us a million dollars and you’ve got Germany.”
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I kinda like this Jay-Z thing, where he’s retired, but he keeps doing shows. I think I beat him to that. If you say you’re retired, people don’t bother you so much, and then if you want to do something, you can do it.
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The critics. When they’re right, they’re right for the wrong reasons. And they’re usually wrong.
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To people who want to be rich and famous, I’d say, “Get rich first and see if that doesn’t cover it.”
BILL MURRAY -
In Japan, you have no idea what they are saying, and they can’t help you either. Nothing makes any sense. They’re very polite, but you feel like a joke is being played on you the entire time you’re there.
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I don’t believe that you can give the same performance every take. It’s physically impossible, so why bother? If you don’t do what is happening at that moment, then it’s not real. Then you’re holding something back.
BILL MURRAY -
I would jump into the middle of the street and say, “excuse me, there’s a Mercedes that’s got to get through here.” And I would push people out of the way, “get out of the way! Let him through!” Smacking their cars and stuff. Just like, “whack” and you just jump into it.
BILL MURRAY -
Nowadays, the scripts are just so much better, that you don’t have to feel that way. You feel like the script’s coming to you, you can just relax. You don’t have to drive the boat.
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The more relaxed you are, the better you are at everything.
BILL MURRAY -
Every moment that you share someone else’s pain, feel what they feel, makes you more human.
BILL MURRAY -
Golf was my first glimpse of comedy. I was a caddy when I was a kid. I was on the golf course rather than being in lessons, but I can play better now than I could then.
BILL MURRAY -
You have to hope that [good things] happen to you. […] That’s the only thing we really, surely have, is hope. You hope that you can be alive, that things will happen to you that you’ll actually witness, that you’ll participate in.
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I’ve got kids and that’s important. It’s funny, you think that there’s an expiration date on them and there just isn’t.
BILL MURRAY -
I knew that’s where I was going. I knew we were going to Italy. You couldn’t make this movie in America at this price. I knew it was going to be big. I knew there was going to be a ship involved and that there was going to be a set as big as the ship.
BILL MURRAY