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So far, I’ve only sailed in the Caribbean. I’ve sailed the Virgin Island and The Grenadines. I liked all that. We charted some really crummy boats in the Grenadines. That made for an exciting sailing trip (laughs) when everything goes well.

Bill Murray

I’ve killed myself so many times, I don’t even exist anymore.
BILL MURRAY

Day Groundhog Groundhogs
But I can only take so much TV, because there is so much advice. I find people will preach about virtually anything – your diet, how to live your life, how to improve your golf. The lot. I have always had a thing against the Mister Know-It-Alls.
BILL MURRAY

Advice Golf People
It’s hard to be an artist. It’s hard to be anything. It’s hard to be.
BILL MURRAY

Anything Artist Hard
I kinda like this Jay-Z thing, where he’s retired, but he keeps doing shows. I think I beat him to that. If you say you’re retired, people don’t bother you so much, and then if you want to do something, you can do it.
BILL MURRAY

People Thinking Want
I met a woman who photographed celebrity dogs for a book, and she told me that Ralph Lauren’s dog is named Rugby. I said, Yeah, but his real name is Stickball.
BILL MURRAY

Book Dog Real
Chicks dig me because I rarely wear underwear, and when I do, it’s usually something unusual.
BILL MURRAY

Stripes Underwear Unusual
I really don’t know what’s going to come out of my mouth.
BILL MURRAY

Intuition Knows Mouths
Totie Fields is one of my benchmarks for a lot of things. There was a standard of show business.
BILL MURRAY

Fields Shows Standards
The cool part about naming your kid is you don’t have to add six numbers to make sure the name is available.
BILL MURRAY

Kids Names Numbers
I mean, everybody would love to have their clothes torn off by a mob of girls, but being screamed at is different.
BILL MURRAY

Being Different Everbody Girl Mean
I’m a nut, but not just a nut.
BILL MURRAY

Funny Insanity Nuts
I was in the Virgin Islands once. I met a girl. We ate lobster, drank piña coladas. At sunset, we made love like sea otters. That was a pretty good day. Why couldn’t I get that day over and over and over?
BILL MURRAY

Day Girl Good Sunset
And when I told my sons I might be in City of Ember, they said, ‘Oh! You’re gonna be the mayor?’ And I hadn’t even read the script yet.
BILL MURRAY

Cities might Son
In Japan, you have no idea what they are saying, and they can’t help you either. Nothing makes any sense. They’re very polite, but you feel like a joke is being played on you the entire time you’re there.
BILL MURRAY

Country Helping Ideas
People say I’m difficult and sometimes that’s a badge of honour.
BILL MURRAY

Badges People Sometimes
When I was a little kid playing baseball, my manager called me Sleepy. And only a few people, who know me from way, way back, call me that still. I used to drift off and that’s why they made me the catcher, so I wouldn’t fall asleep. That gift I have still.
BILL MURRAY

Baseball Fall Kids
I go home and stay there. I wash and scrub up each day, and that’s it. One month I actually grew a moustache, just so I could say that I’d done something.
BILL MURRAY

Home Month Mustache
You cannot pray them out of hell.
BILL MURRAY

Hell Praying Scary
There’s definitely a lot of trash that comes with the prize of being famous. It’s a nice gift, but there’s a lot of wrapping and paper and junk to cut through.
BILL MURRAY

Gift Girl Mean Nice Paper Wrapping
Different vodkas have different effects. Some make you feel a little… poly-lingual. Some make you feel like you want to talk back to someone who’s giving you a hard time. Some make you feel like lifting kettle bells.
BILL MURRAY

Giving Hard Times Want
The money thing is, the sort of Elvis Presley thing of buying you mother car is great, that’s very good. My mother has learned how to spend money.
BILL MURRAY

Buying Car Mother
My iPhone has 2 million times the storage of the 1969 Apollo 11 computer. They went to the moon. I throw birds at pig houses
BILL MURRAY

iPhone Moon Pigs
And even if we win, if we win, HAH! Even if we win! Even if we play so far above our heads that our noses bleed for a week to ten days; even if God in Heaven above comes down and points his hand at our side of the field.
BILL MURRAY

Children Girls Heads Men Noses
Here’s the thing, you just have to drive a lot faster, and if you don’t get there, we’re both fired.
BILL MURRAY

Downsizing Faster Fired
The way financing for independent movies goes is great. You get the money from the guy who’s actually doing the distribution in France.
BILL MURRAY

Giving Guy Independent
You work, you get paid, you drink.
BILL MURRAY

Drink Get Paid
I don’t believe that you can give the same performance every take. It’s physically impossible, so why bother? If you don’t do what is happening at that moment, then it’s not real. Then you’re holding something back.
BILL MURRAY

Believe Giving Real

So far, I’ve only sailed in the Caribbean. I’ve sailed the Virgin Island and The Grenadines. I liked all that. We charted some really crummy boats in the Grenadines. That made for an exciting sailing trip (laughs) when everything goes well.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

So far, I’ve only sailed in the Caribbean. I’ve sailed the Virgin Island and The Grenadines. I liked all that. We charted some really crummy boats in the Grenadines. That made for an exciting sailing trip (laughs) when everything goes well.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More Bill Murray Quotes