Truly, the only stupid people I’ve ever met, the most absolutely clueless, are the very people that produce television.
BILL HICKSSTRATFORD SUCKS!’ Am I supposed to run after these guys? I’d just stand there, you know. They’d back up. ‘STRATFORD SUCKS! …STRATFORD SUCKS!’ I’d say, ‘I know. I go there. You’re wasting gas, man.
More Bill Hicks Quotes
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If you are living for tomorrow, you will always be one day behind.
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Now I wonder why we’re f-ked up as a race. I’ve read the Bible. I can’t find the word “bunny” or “chocolate” anywhere in the f-king book.
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Good comedy helps people know they’re not alone. Great comedy provides an answer.
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If ur going to have a war on drugs, have them against ALL drugs, including alcohol, the number one offender.
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I began working quite young, writing, growing, maturing, always striving to top myself – to make people laugh hard at things they know and believe deep in their hearts to be true.
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We all pay for life with death, so everything in between should be free.
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The world’s like a ride in a fairground & when you choose to go on it you think it’s real, that’s how powerful our minds are
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I’ve had seven balls of light come off a UFO…explain to me telepathically we are all one and there’s no such thing as death.
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If you don’t think drugs have done good things for us, then take all of your records, tapes and CD’s and burn them.
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Rock stars against drugs–that’s what we want, isn’t it? Government-approved rock-n-roll? Woo! We’re partying now!
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I do not believe making money in order to consume goods is mankind’s sole purpose on this planet. If you’re wondering what I believe our purpose on this planet is, I’ll give you a hint… it has to do with creating and sharing.
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I’m tired of this back-slappin’ “isn’t humanity neat” bullshit. We’re a virus with shoes.
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I’m very tired of staring out into your vacant faces looking back at me. Wanting to fill your empty lives with humor you couldn’t possibly think of yourself… Good evening!
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I used to drink, I did, I had to quit. Man, I was an embarrassing drunk. I’d get pulled over by the cops, I’d be so drunk I’d be out dancing to their lights thinking I’d made it to another club.
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We’ll see who believes in me now. I am the Prankster God – I am killing me!
BILL HICKS