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I can’t believe a war against drugs when they have anti-drug commercials on TV all day long followed by This Bud is for you.

Bill Hicks

It’s my object to be stared at like a dog that’s just been shown a card trick.
BILL HICKS

Cards Dog Objects Tricks
[Comedy] is an escape from illusions. The audience is…thinking, ‘This bullshit we see and hear all day makes no sense.’
BILL HICKS

Bullshit Comedy Thinking
Children are smarter than any of us. Know how I know that? I don’t know one child with a full time job and children.
BILL HICKS

Children Funny Jobs
If you don’t think drugs have done good things for us, then take all of your records, tapes and CD’s and burn them.
BILL HICKS

Burning Drugs Political Thinking
No one can give you any answers. There aren’t any. You have to discover for yourself-you must learn to navigate the mystery.
BILL HICKS

Answers Giving Mystery
The best kind of comedy to me is when you make people laugh at things they’ve never laughed at, and also take a light into the darkened corners of people’s minds, exposing them to the light.
BILL HICKS

Exposing Laughing Light People
To make marijuana against the law is like saying God made a big mistake.
BILL HICKS

Marijuana Mistake Weed
You know we armed Iraq. I wondered about that too, you know during the Persian Gulf war those intelligence reports would come out: “Iraq: incredible weapons – incredible weapons.” How do you know that? “Uh, well… we looked at the receipts.”
BILL HICKS

Country Funny Humor Intelligence War
I used to love to call L.A. when I lived in New York… Is that the Big One I hear in the background? Bye, you lizard scum! Bye!
BILL HICKS

Bye Country
I do not believe making money in order to consume goods is mankind’s sole purpose on this planet.
BILL HICKS

Believe Order Purpose
What do you say we lighten things up and talk about abortion?
BILL HICKS

Abortion Say Talk Thing
To me pornography is…spending all your money and not educating the people in America, but spending it instead on weapons.
BILL HICKS

Country People Weapons
I love the Pope, I love seeing him in his Pope-Mobile, his three feet of bullet proof plexi-glass. That’s faith in action folks! You know he’s got God on his side.
BILL HICKS

Funny Glasses Humor Mobile Seeing
Mushrooms grow on cow turds. I love that. I think that’s why you giggle the first hour.
BILL HICKS

Cow Mushroom Thinking
The war on drugs to me is absolutely phoney, its so obviously phoney, ok? It’s a war against our civil rights, that’s all it is. They’re using it to make us afraid to go out at night, afraid of each other, so that we lock ourselves in our homes and they get suspending our rights one by one.
BILL HICKS

Afraid Home Night Suspending War
….All drugs should be legal. War is wrong. The rich get richer. The poor get poorer. Thank you. I’ll be here all week.
BILL HICKS

Drug Poor Rich War Week

I can’t believe a war against drugs when they have anti-drug commercials on TV all day long followed by This Bud is for you.

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I can’t believe a war against drugs when they have anti-drug commercials on TV all day long followed by This Bud is for you.

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Popular Authors

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