Just one thing I know for sure, chicks dig jerks.
BILL HICKSI am a misanthropic humanist… Do I like people? They’re great, IN THEORY.
More Bill Hicks Quotes
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In the beginning God created the heavans and the earth… see you at the final.
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Isn’t that weird, we’ve made nature against the law. That’s how un-natural we’ve become.
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I need my sleep. I need about eight hours a day, and about ten at night.
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When two or more people agree on an issue, I form on the other side.
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The war on drugs to me is absolutely phoney, its so obviously phoney, ok? It’s a war against our civil rights, that’s all it is. They’re using it to make us afraid to go out at night, afraid of each other, so that we lock ourselves in our homes and they get suspending our rights one by one.
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I was in Australia….Lotta leg room down under. Apartments: dollar a month. 2000-acre den….think of the parties.
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BTW A 24 week old embryo is not a human being. You’re not a human being until you’re in my phone book.
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But where did this veneration of childbirth come from? I missed that meeting. Childbirth is wonderful, childbirth is a miracle. Wrong. It’s no more a miracle than eating food and a turd coming out your ass.
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What did moths bump into before the electric light bulb was invented? Boy, the lightbulb really screwed the moth up didn’t it? Are there moths on their way to the sun now going, It’s gonna be worth it!.
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The best kind of comedy to me is when you make people laugh at things they’ve never laughed at, and also take a light into the darkened corners of people’s minds, exposing them to the light.
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I go to dance clubs…about once a year just to justify the other 364 days I spend in my apartment going ‘God, what idiots!’
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That’s why I always recommend a psychedelic experience because it makes you realize that all you’ve learned is in fact just learned and not necessarily the truth.
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The definition of black irony is Pro-lifers killing Doctors who do abortions
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At least he f-kin’ jams! If it’s a choice between eternal Hell and good tunes, and eternal Heaven and New Kids on the f-kin’ Block … I’m gonna be surfin’ on the lake of fire, rockin’ out.
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Life is only a dream, and we are the imagination of ourselves.
BILL HICKS