I’ve had a great time on the road, I would say shooting guns with a silencer in Jacksonville, Fla.
BILL BURRDeny your emotions and act like you have answers
More Bill Burr Quotes
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If I get married I get a tax break, if I have a kid I get a tax break, if I get a mortgage I get a tax break. I don’t have any kids and I drive a hybrid, I think I should get a tax break.
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It’s been a dream to work with Netflix because they don’t have any pressure from advertisers.
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I wasn’t the good looking guy, I wasn’t the hot chick, I wasn’t the fat guy, I didn’t have a catchphrase, I didn’t wear a silly hat. I was just trying to improve as a comedian.
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It’s a whole new world as far as getting a show on the air. There’s good things and bad things.
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Let’s go to Brunch. What a great idea! Why would you want to sleep in on a Sunday when you can go pay $18 for eggs? Now, you’re thinking.
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I love making movies, and being in any that I can be in. I’d like to be in those giant movies, as the fifth or sixth lead, and have three or four killer scenes. You don’t have the responsibility of the entire movie being on you. I like those roles. I’m shooting for the middle.
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Haven’t you noticed that every time the government f-ks up McDonald’s has a new sandwich?
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What are they worried about? Nobody ever walked into a show as a bleeding heart liberal and had a comedian undo 30 years of life experience.
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You’re a kid, your whole life is awesome. It’s awesome, right? You had no money, no ID, no cell phone, no nothing, no keys to the house. You just ran outside into the woods. You weren’t scared of nothing. I challenge you to do that as an adult.
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Do you know how many times a week people ask me why I’m yelling?
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Any other town you go to there’s this little devil and a little angel on your shoulder.
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It was right after 9/11 and I decided to walk around the grounds of the Pentagon, because I had never been there.
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If you get a chance to go outside of the country, you start examining where you’re from and some of the thought processes.
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It’s just if one person says anything it becomes click bait and then they start talking about the comedy climate which is hilarious, so no.
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I just do my act. If people in England don’t get my joke I make fun of myself for telling it.
BILL BURR