black
grey
blue
red
brown
white

I’m always looking at new ways to tell a joke so that it doesn’t get stale while working on new jokes every night or I would go absolutely crazy and would want to kill myself. I just want to go in there and talk about what’s bugging me.

Bill Burr

It’s just if one person says anything it becomes click bait and then they start talking about the comedy climate which is hilarious, so no.
BILL BURR

People Stupid Talking
If I can sell out clubs and theaters and play dirtbags in movies, and get blown up in a car or get the crap beat out of me in a movie, that’s good for me; I’m good.
BILL BURR

Car Clubs Crap Play
I am so pro-swine flu it’s – it’s like ridiculous.
BILL BURR

Flu Ridiculous Swine
I’m not going to lie. I am a psycho. Luckily, I get most of it out on stage.
BILL BURR

Lying Psycho Stage
Deny your emotions and act like you have answers
BILL BURR

Answers Emotion Like You
My parents have a ridiculous work ethic; my dad just works, works, works, works, works. I think it would be hard to find a guy who’s logged more hours than that guy.
BILL BURR

Dad Ethic Thinking Work
Actually they [ Netflix] were telling us to push it further and I’ve never gotten a nod like that from anybody in the industry, so it’s been awesome to work with them. I’m very happy where we’re at.
BILL BURR

Happy Industry Netflix Very
A little good advice, a little bad advice.You go to Las Vegas, there’s like a devil and a devil and they’re just battling it out the whole time. It’s like, “Smoke some crack!” “Get a hooker!” And then I go, “YEA! Yea, this is a good town. Smoke some crack and get a hooker! Alright!”
BILL BURR

Advice Battling Devil Hooker Smoke
Some guy workin’ at Home Depot, he wants to f-k just as many women as a celebrity. But he can’t do it, because whores don’t care about lumber.
BILL BURR

Care Guy Home
I just do my act. If people in England don’t get my joke I make fun of myself for telling it.
BILL BURR

Country Fun People
I consider Ric Flair to be one of the great comedic minds. But I never got to see him growing up because that was back when they still had territories.
BILL BURR

Growing Up Mind Territory
It’s a whole new world as far as getting a show on the air. There’s good things and bad things.
BILL BURR

Air Good Things World
When I was coming up the DC Improv was considered the best Improv out there. It’s always been high quality stuff coming out of there.
BILL BURR

Coming Out Quality Stuff
I do my podcast on Mondays for a specific reason. A lot of people go to work and don’t like their jobs. If you give people something to laugh about, it’s good.
BILL BURR

Jobs Monday People
Only an adult with dying dreams can appreciate how awesome it is to have a dog.
BILL BURR

Appreciate Dog Dream
If you try to deliver a funny line in a funny way, it comes out as wacky and you ruin the scene.
BILL BURR

Lines Trying Way

I’m always looking at new ways to tell a joke so that it doesn’t get stale while working on new jokes every night or I would go absolutely crazy and would want to kill myself. I just want to go in there and talk about what’s bugging me.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

I’m always looking at new ways to tell a joke so that it doesn’t get stale while working on new jokes every night or I would go absolutely crazy and would want to kill myself. I just want to go in there and talk about what’s bugging me.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More Bill Burr Quotes