If I can tell someone a story that makes them bend over and laugh, that’s bigger than anything else.
BERNIE MACStand-up is what I am; stand-up is what made me.
More Bernie Mac Quotes
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My humor had changed from foolishness to making sense.
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Okay, first rule of this carpool. No breaking wind in my car. The only gas that Bernie Mac want to be smelling is unleaded.
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I learned hard lessons in life; I had to because I had so much happen: My mother died my sophomore year in high school. The next year, same day, my brother dropped dead. Two years after that, I got married because my girlfriend got pregnant. The year after my wedding, my father – who I had only recently met – died.
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I’m not afraid to fail. Sometimes when you lose, you win. Sometimes when you win, you lose.
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I want to play a villain – I can’t wait to play a villain.
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I became the storyteller of South Side Chicago. I used an old Kiwi liquid shoe polish as a microphone. I’d go around the house interviewing everybody, telling stupid jokes, doing voices. I mimicked Sidney Poitier, Sammy Davis Jr., people on ‘Laugh-In,’ Flip Wilson.
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Fear is not one of my attributes.
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I took my sports experience to my life on stage. That’s why I’m so disciplined. Playing sports, I was always underestimated. I was never picked first to do anything. This always helped me. It taught me how to push myself.
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I hate to compare anything, especially while I’m promoting. I feel that’s another disrespect, but ‘Ocean’s 13’ is the best movie I’ve ever done in my life. No question.
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Making people laugh is what I’ve been doing since I was like four or five years old. I still have a lust, I still have a passion. I don’t care about how I look, I’m dedicated to the laughs.
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Bernie Mac just says what you think but are afraid to say.
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Black audiences are hard. They always think they’re better than you. So you got to come with a little extra to satisfy them.
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They say if you don’t have your health you ain’t got nothing, but the truth is you ain’t got nothing if you don’t have no one to worry about your health.
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My family are police officers, detectives. My brother Mitch is FBI. Mitch is like that – a stern enforcer.
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I have so much respect for what’s funny.
BERNIE MAC







