“Teenagers travel in droves, packs, swarms. … To the librarian, they’re a gaggle of geese. To the cook, they’re a scourge of locusts. To department stores, they’re a big beautiful exaltation of larks … all lovely and loose and jingly.”

A good ad should be like a good sermon: It must not only comfort the afflicted, it also must afflict the comfortable.

Creativity often consists of merely turning up what is already there. Did you know that right and left shoes were thought up only a little more than a century ago?

Creativity varies inversely with the number of cooks involved in the broth.

To be a success in advertising you must want to fill other people with a passion for possession.

deferring gratification is a good definition of being civilized.

Nowhere in the world can you find a wider variety of empty calories than at any American convenience store.

That’s what makes a human a human, if we store information outside our bodies.

I despise shopping and department stores.

He who will lose a present good for one in expectation hath some wit, but a small store of wisdom.

The order of the words varies, but beer and ice are always two of the top four staples for sale. If we were all taking care of ourselves, wouldn’t the convenience stores compete for our dollars with signs that read “Fruit, Vegetables, Bread, Milk”?

My family owns a music store in Claremont, California, called The Claremont Folk Music Center.

Whoever has recognized the vainglory of individuality will not attach any store (“n’attachera aucun prix à”, Fr.) to fame.