“The pipe marks the point at which the orangutan ends and man begins.”

Give me a look, give me a face, That makes simplicity a grace Robes loosely flowing, hair as free Such sweet neglect more taketh me Than all the adulteries of art: They strike mine eyes, but not my heart.

For a man to write well, there are required three necessaries: to read the best authors, observe the best speakers, and much exercise of his own style.

Sweet meat must have sour sauce.

Language most shows a man; speak that I may see thee; it springs out of the most retired and inmost parts of us, and is the image of the parent of it, the mind. No glass renders a man’s form or likeness so true as his speech.

The burnt child dreads the fire.

Of all wild beasts preserve me from a tyrant; and of all tame a flatterer.

Greatness of name, in the father, ofttimes helps not forth, but overwhelms the son: They stand too near one another. The shadow kills the growth.

Nor use too swelling, or ill-sounded words . . . .

I do honor the very flea of his dog.

Fear to do base, unworthy things is valor; if they be one to us, to suffer them is valor too.

Nothing is more short-lived than pride.

How ready is heaven to those that pray!

Peace is never more than one thought away.

Heaven prepares good men with crosses; but no ill can happen to a good man.

Love that is ignorant and hatred have almost the same ends.

Hell itself must yield to industry.

A lot of people started drinking martinis and smoking cigarettes because they felt it was cool.

Usually we trust that nature has a master plan. But what was it she expected us to do with tobacco?.

And the blunts and liquor killing our lungs and liver. The asthmatic drug-addict, I function with it

It is hard to quit smoking. Every one of them looks real good to me right about now. Every cigarette looks like it was made by God, rolled by Jesus and moistened shut with Claudia Schiffer’s pussy.

That’s what I like about [smoking] . . . taking a drag off of death, Mmm! Gives me a sense of controlling my own destiny. What power! What exhilaration! Want a drag?

I regret starting drinking alcohol, smoking cigarettes and joining Facebook.

FLYING DOWN SUNSET SMOKING CRACK TRANSVESTITE IN THE FRONT EDDI MURPHY IN THE BACK MOP HAD ME GRINDY AND GRIDDY MARILYN MANSON.

I love smoking. I miss it every day of my life. If I found out that it didn’t cause cancer, I would go out and buy, like, eight cartons right now.