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Humor is an excellent method of keeping a tight rein on unproductive displays of emotion.

Barbara Mertz

If all else fails, we will simply have to drug our attendants, overpower the guards, raise the oppressed peasants to arms, and take over the government.
BARBARA MERTZ

Arms Drug Government
Love has a very dulling effect on the brain
BARBARA MERTZ

Brain Dulling Effects Love
Giving other people advice is one of the most irritating and useless activities known to man.
BARBARA MERTZ

Giving Men People
In the silence I heard Bastet, who had retreated under the bed, carrying on a mumbling, profane monologue. (If you ask how I knew it was profane, I presume you have never owned a cat.)
BARBARA MERTZ

Bed Cat Silence
there is nothing like a garden to rest the soul.
BARBARA MERTZ

Garden Gardening Soul
Emerson,’ I said, choosing my words with care, ‘it is a sheer drop from the cleft down to the base of the cliff. If you are bent on breaking your arm or your leg or your neck or all three, find a place closer to home so we won’t have to carry you such a distance.
BARBARA MERTZ

Distance Home Three
Writing is like a bird-watcher watching for birds: the stories are there: you just have to train yourself to look for them.
BARBARA MERTZ

Bird Looks Writing
But the dust! And the clutter! My housewifely and scholarly instincts were equally offended.
BARBARA MERTZ

Dust Instinct Scholarly
Noble causes have a deplorable effect on the morals of the persons who espouse them.
BARBARA MERTZ

Noble Political Politics
Spring is always cruel, with its false promise of resurrection.
BARBARA MERTZ

Promise Resurrection Spring
a church ought to express the joy of religion as well as its majesty.
BARBARA MERTZ

Church Joy Majesty
The approval of a cat cannot but flatter the recipient.
BARBARA MERTZ

Approval Cat Flatter Recipient
A lady cannot be blamed if a master criminal takes a fancy to her.
BARBARA MERTZ

Criminals Fancy Masters
Martyrdom is often the result of excessive gullibility.
BARBARA MERTZ

Martyrdom Results Sacrifice
Husbands do not care to be contradicted. Indeed, I do not know anyone who does.
BARBARA MERTZ

Care Contradicted Husband
Ramses had always been fond of Helen, in his peculiar fashion, but if he had looked at me as he was looking at her, I would have sent for a constable.
BARBARA MERTZ

Fashion Helen Peculiar

Humor is an excellent method of keeping a tight rein on unproductive displays of emotion.

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Humor is an excellent method of keeping a tight rein on unproductive displays of emotion.

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