It’s easier to put on slippers than to carpet the whole world.
AL FRANKENToday I will masterbate! Okay, that was a mistake. I should have written “Today I will masterbate–if I want to!
More Al Franken Quotes
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By best, I mean when I have a real sense of doing the right thing and doing good for people and the connected universe of everybody.
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Skepticism turns to cynicism, which leads to apathy and despair, which can cause sleeplessness, dry-mouth, and loss of sex drive?
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I do have a self-censor; everybody does, or at least most who are not pathological do.
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I’m angry at the right wing media. And by that I don’t mean the media is right wing.
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Minnesotans know the difference between the job of satirist and the job of senator. And so do I.
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creates jobs all over the world, and makes life easier for millions of Americans.
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My dad didn’t graduate from high school, ended up being a printing salesman, probably never made more than $8,000 a year.
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It is my fondest wish that in the fullness of time, the American people will look back on the Franken presidency as something of a mixed bag and not as a complete disaster.
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And we didn’t need to worry about foreign websites illegally distributing the latest TV shows and blockbuster movies online.
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The only job they had, which is to give accurate, objective ratings to financial products.
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The way I see it, I’m not going to Washington to be the 60th Democratic senator. I’m going to Washington to be the second senator from the state of Minnesota.
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And the problem with the mainstream media is that it has these other biases that are much more important.
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I’ve spent my entire career being a satirist.
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Love takes attention and work and is the best thing in the world.
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The news movement conservatives that are just laying out, slathering out the disinformation and the lies, as I discuss in my book, ‘Lies and the Lying Liars Who Tell Them: A Fair and Balanced Look at the Right.’
AL FRANKEN