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Being in a relationship is like being in A.A. My friends ask me, ‘How’s it going with that girl?’ ‘One day at a time, man.’

Adam Ferrara

Go to bed.’ ‘Don’t you feel like we’re soul…’
ADAM FERRARA

Bed Feel Forever Go Like Soul
The only marriage I’ve observed for any length of time is my parents – 35 years. I asked my pop, I go, ‘Pop, 35 years – what do you hope for?’ He’s like, ‘I hope you die first.’
ADAM FERRARA

Funny Length Marriage Observed Parent Time Year
Sex is important to guys. We need stories to tell our friends.
ADAM FERRARA

Friend Funny Humor Important Need Sex Story Tell
I love to believe that there’s one god but there’s many different religions so there’s just the question of which long distance company you pick.
ADAM FERRARA

Believe Different Distance God Long Question Religious
One day in the shower, you figure it out. It’s a special day in a man’s life. I was like, ‘Oh, I found me a hobby.’
ADAM FERRARA

Day Figure Funny Hobby Humor Life Man Shower Special
I think human arrogance will be the demise of civilization.
ADAM FERRARA

Arrogance Civilization Demise Human Thinking
My dad was a big car guy. If you wanted to spend time with my dad, he was working on the car.
ADAM FERRARA

Car Dad Guy Money Spend Trust Vehicle Wanted Working
I don’t think it’s fair – you get married, you give your wife a wedding ring. I think you should give her a mood ring.
ADAM FERRARA

Boy Cutting Give Home Jewelry Married Mood Ring Wedding
Ladies, your happiness is very important to us. You have to understand that. Because when you’re happy, you let us touch you.
ADAM FERRARA

Funny Happiness Happy Humor Important Ladies Touch
What if God’s a woman? Not only am I going to hell, I’ll never know why!
ADAM FERRARA

Funny God Going Hell Humor Know Reason Woman
I got into cars through my father. He used to work on cars. My job was to hold the light, which pretty much was the limit of my mechanical abilities.
ADAM FERRARA

Ability Car Father Job Light Mechanical Pretty Used Work
I love my girlfriend, don’t get me wrong. I truly love this woman, but I have the ability to have sex without any emotional involvement. It’s a gift.
ADAM FERRARA

Ability Emotional Environment Funny Gift Girlfriend Love Sex Truly Woman Wrong
My favorite Catholic holiday is Easter. For those of you that don’t know, Easter is the day we celebrate Jesus rising from the grave and coming back to Earth as a rabbit that hides colored eggs.
ADAM FERRARA

Celebrate Celebration Day Earth Easter Egg Favorite Funny Holiday Jesus Rabit
I talk a lot about women in my act, ’cause let’s face it — if I was hungry, I would talk about food.
ADAM FERRARA

Cause Face Food Funny Humor Hungry Lot Talk Women
As soon as you lay down, that’s when the most bizarre things start coming out of her mouth. ‘Goodnight, baby.’ ‘Do you think we were together in a past life?’ ‘Yeah, and I died of sleep deprivation. Go to bed.’ ‘Don’t you feel like we’re soul…’
ADAM FERRARA

Baby Bizarre Down Funny Good Humor Most Mouth
You gotta fight. You gotta get out the negative energy. Don’t let it build up. You end up screaming at each other over something totally stupid, like, ‘Well, why’d you put this spoon in this drawer then?’ ‘
ADAM FERRARA

Build End Energy Fight Funny Humor Negative Screaming Stupid Up

Being in a relationship is like being in A.A. My friends ask me, ‘How’s it going with that girl?’ ‘One day at a time, man.’

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Being in a relationship is like being in A.A. My friends ask me, ‘How’s it going with that girl?’ ‘One day at a time, man.’

Related Topics

Popular Authors

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