“Revenge is sweet and not fattening.”

The length of a film should be directly related to the endurance of the human bladder.

Kicking is very important in football. In fact, some of the more enthusiastic players even kick the ball, occasionally.

I’m frightened of eggs, worse than frightened, they revolt me.

Even my failures make money and become classics a year after I make them.

Self-plagiarism is style.

Some of our most exquisite murders have been domestic, performed with tenderness in simple, homey places like the kitchen table.

I always try to look at things as though I were remembering them three years later.

A good film is when the price of the dinner, the theatre admission and the babysitter were worth it.

All love scenes started on the set are continued in the dressing room.

Conversation is the enemy of good wine and food.

When you can look forward, and the road is clear ahead, and now you are going to create something – that’s as happy as I’d want to be.

There is nothing so good as a burial at sea. It is simple, tidy, and not very incriminating.

Everything’s perverted in a different way.

I’ve become a body of films, not a man, I am all those films.

Someone once told me that every minute a murder occurs, so I don’t want to waste your time, I know you want to go back to work.

Television is like the American toaster, you push the button and the same thing pops up everytime.

It’ll be great. Of course I was disappointed last year. But I’ll get my revenge.

Don’t revenge, try changing yourself.

Writing well is the best revenge.

Gorgeous hair is the best revenge.

Just remember: Surviving is the best revenge, no matter what the disaster has been.

To be angry is to revenge the faults of others on ourselves.

I shall revenge myself in the cruelest way you can imagine. I shall forget it.

No matter how many times people try to criticize you, the best revenge is to prove them wrong.