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1. black
2. grey
3. blue
4. red
5. brown
6. white

I lost my job, well I didn’t lose it, I know where it is, there’s just some other guy doing it now.

Bobcat Goldthwait

Related Topics

GuyJobsLost

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More Bobcat Goldthwait Quotes

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  How can you be a vegetarian atheist and own a gun? Well, that’s who I am.

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• 

  Don’t hoo, hoo, hoo me. There’s a fine line between hoo, hoo, hoo and hiel, hiel, hiel.

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• 

  I’m against gun control. It’s not that I like guns, it’s just that allowing Americans to have guns will increase the chances that a bunch of rednecks will blow each other’s heads off.

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• 

  In fact, with Michael Jackson, I think those mourning people… They aren’t even waking Michael, they’re waking the Michael Jackson of ’84.

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• 

  I can smell parents’ stomach acid right now, but they know that whole “You gotta get a job and you gotta settle for what people perceive as success” thing is really absurd.

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• 

  Quit everything until you find something that you just cannot quit.

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• 

  America’s one of the finest countries anyone ever stole.

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• 

  Stand-up was interesting to me at the beginning, because I was trying to parody it. My early stand-up was really Andy Kaufman-esque, and then I became the very thing I was making fun of.

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• 

  If you ever see me at a boat show or at a car show, blow my head off.

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• 

  I lost my job, well I didn’t lose it, I know where it is, there’s just some other guy doing it now.

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• 

  In my first stand-up acts there wasn’t material even. You know, I’d go on stage and cry and read a Dear John letter or gut fish on stage. I could be odd – and it’s what interested me as a comedian.

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• 

  They never were given a chance to give their respects to the death of the guy they loved back in ’84.

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• 

  Go on, try weasel, try squirrel; it tastes like chicken, it tastes just like chicken! If it tastes just like chicken, why don’t you gimme some damn chicken?

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• 

  That’s human nature – we want to completely rewrite history so it can be comfortable.

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• 

  Fame is like a big eraser. It’s strange, now that I’m famous. In my parents’ opinion, all the shitty things – all the wreckage of my past – is erased.

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• 

  Kurt (Cobain) was a fan of my standup, which was pretty weird.

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