If you got a hit every third time that you went up to bat in the major leagues, you’d be the greatest hitter of all time. I think my average is a little better than that.
Most of the times to be honest with you, I get sexually harassed certainly more than I do to females, because… they are comfortable with me, and because they know I can’t take it to a dangerous place.
There are things that I won’t joke about, but it’s not because I don’t think they’re funny or they can’t be made funny. It’s just that they don’t fit my particular skill set.
If I make a joke about black people or Asian people or whatever, and then an Asian comes up to me afterwards and says, “That joke offended me,” I’m still more or less not going to listen, but at least it makes sense, like I said something that was about them.
I admire ventriloquists, because I can’t do that. I mean, I might get mistaken for a ventriloquist dummy every now and then, but I can’t do what they do.
I would love, obviously, just to keep doing stand-up. That’s the constant. That’s the thing that I’m going to do for the rest of my life, but also I would like a TV show at some point.
