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Men’s brains are smaller than those of women so they can fit into their penises.

Bette Midler

I’ve always been lucky enough to have great audiences. It has been quite a life.
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Audience Enough Lucky
I’m mad about God! That’s why I’m divine.
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Divine God Mad
My mother would only let us go to the musicals.
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Let Mother Musical
From a distance the world looks blue and green, and the snow-capped mountains white. From a distance the ocean meets the stream, and the eagle takes to flight. From a distance, there is harmony, and it echoes through the land. It’s the voice of hope, it’s the voice of peace, it’s the voice of every man
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Distance Men Ocean
hen you’re in your third adulthood, the one that leads to the grave, and you ask yourself, “What will I do between now and then?” Instead of thinking in terms of glamour, you start thinking in terms of reform – your contribution to the world.
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Ask Glamorous Grave Think Yourself
I tried to charm the pants off Bob Dylan, but everyone will be disappointed to learn that I was unsuccessful. I got close – a couple of fast feels in the front seat of a Cadillac.
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Cadillacs Couple Sex
When I finally did stop and look at my life, I realized that I had done what I’d set out to do. In my pitiful little way, I had climbed the mountain I had chosen. And there I was, on top.
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Done Looks Mountain
It’s a different world now: Stars come and go quickly, and there are so many of them. I read a statistic that all the record companies combined used to put out around 3,000 albums in a year. Now they put out something like 30,000!
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Different Stars Years
The [film] business is run by men, and they’re basically interested in their own species, and they’re not so interested in women belonging to the human race.
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Men Movie Running
Make sure your life is a rare entertainment! It doesn’t take anything drastic. You needn’t be gorgeous or wealthy or smart, just very enthusiastic!
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Entertainment Life Smart
We’re all divine, but I was the only one who had the nerve to call myself that.
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Divine Myself Nerves
If only I’d known my differentness would be an asset, then my earlier life would have been much easier.
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Actresses Being Different Singers
When it’s three o’clock in New York, it’s still 1938 in London.
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Humorous Inspirational New York
There’s a kind of emotional exploration you plumb with a friend that you don’t really do with your family.
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Emotional Friends Kind
My daughter very independent. But if she’s upset about something, she will absolutely let me know. She’s great – a real tough cookie.
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Daughter Independent Real
If sex is such a natural phenomenon, how come there are so many books on how to do it?
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Funny Hilarious Love
That’s our mission: to clean and green New York City – one block at a time.
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Block Cities Country
Honey, I can smell the scent of another woman from 500 paces.
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Infidelity Pace Smell
It’s the one who won’t be taken that cannot seem to give, and the soul afraid of dying that never learns to live.
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Dance Fear Philosophy
When I turned 50, I threw myself a big birthday party, and I looked seriously at what my life has been about. I recommend this to everybody. Ask yourself, “What have I done? How did I do it? Where’d I mess up?
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Assessment Land Party
I fear for the future of the planet. But in a funny way, I’m even sanguine about that.
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Planets Sanguine Way
The first time I saw a picture of [fabled actress] Ethel Barrymore – she was on Broadway and she was wearing pearls. I thought, “That’s who I should grow up to be.” It’s odd, because it was her physical image that I wanted;
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Bombarded Grow Up Ideas
Just because people don’t meet you doesn’t mean they’re not out there breaking their asses trying to get around.
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Mean People Trying
If they [at the audition] don’t like the way you sound they won’t buy you anyway, ripped dress or no ripped dress, ass hanging out or no ass hanging out.
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Dresses Sound Way
There comes a time whenyou haveto let yourclothesgo out in the world and try to make it on their own.
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Time Trying World
I’d make a wonderful Lady Macbeth. I’ll wear a pair of platform shoes or something.
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Lady Macbeth Pairs Shoes
I would much rather watch myself than listen to myself. The moving is second nature, but the listening… that’s the art.
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Art Listening Moving

Men’s brains are smaller than those of women so they can fit into their penises.

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Men’s brains are smaller than those of women so they can fit into their penises.

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Popular Authors

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