“You want my dark side? Have I ever stolen anything? Not so much intentionally. But I don’t think it’s so much stealing as… being a part of the flow of the universe.”

I’d like [Santa Claus] to give Wes Anderson, the director, enough money in his next budget for an aerial shot – just a little copter shot. He really wanted this one helicopter shot, and Disney wouldn’t give him the money. Just wouldn’t give him the money.

Chicago actors are hard-nosed. They’re tough on themselves and their fellow actors. They’re self-demanding.

The cool part about naming your kid is you don’t have to add six numbers to make sure the name is available.

If we don’t get this done, we’re never going to be friends, because if we don’t get the job done, then the one thing we did together that we had to do together we failed.”

I didn’t get into this position by being like a stiff sitting on the set in a folding chair. I did it by walking around on the streets and stirring things up.

The last thing I want is to be (in a film role) is obvious, direct and offensive.

I would jump into the middle of the street and say, “excuse me, there’s a Mercedes that’s got to get through here.” And I would push people out of the way, “get out of the way! Let him through!” Smacking their cars and stuff. Just like, “whack” and you just jump into it.

My iPhone has 2 million times the storage of the 1969 Apollo 11 computer. They went to the moon. I throw birds at pig houses

The human condition means that we can zone out and forget what the hell we’re doing.

I’ve killed myself so many times, I don’t even exist anymore.

Back then, when a movie came out and people saw you on the street, their reaction was so supercharged that it was scary. It would frighten other people. It used to really rattle me.

I think romance basically starts with respect. And new romance always starts with respect. Like the song ‘Love the One You’re With’; there is something to that. It’s not just make love to whomever you’re with, it’s just love whomever you’re with.

You have to be as light as you can be, and you don’t have to be weighted down, stuck in your emotions and stuck in your body, stuck in your head. You just want to try and elevate something.

The truth is, anybody that becomes famous is an ass for a year and a half. You’ve got to give them a year and a half, two years.

If Google doesn’t know the answer, then it’s not a question

Take dead aim on the rich boys. Get them in the crosshairs and take them down. Just remember, they can buy anything but they can’t buy backbone. Don’t let them forget it. Thank you.

Every human being of adult years and sound mind has a legal right to determine what shall be done with his own body.

Public and private funds have been thrown around like confetti at a country fair, to close up and destroy clinics, hospitals, and scientific research laboratories which do not conform to the viewpoint of medical associations.

No, we don’t sit around in dark corners and plan strategies on how we’re going to slant the news. We don’t have to. It comes naturally to most reporters.

Before I was ever in high school, I had dark circles under my eyes.

Before I was even in high school, I had dark circles under my eyes. Rumor was that I was a junkie. I have dark circles under my eyes, deal with it.

[Season 4 of Sherlock Holmes will be] myopically dark. You’re talking about the end of the universe darkness. You can’t see in front of you and would walk into everything dark.

Once there was a man who was afraid of his shadow. Then he met it. Now he glows in the dark.

One dark night the skeletons that they had carefully hidden in an obscure closet appeared, grabbed them around the throat, and strangled them.