“There is a mass of people, we might as well admit, who if they weren’t watching television, would be doing absolutely nothing else.”

Gross ignorance is 144 times worse than ordinary ignorance.

TV’s sameness has destroyed many things, such as the American urge toward independent thought.

Do I believe in ghosts? Of course I do. So do you. Deep in the souls of the most sophisticated of us is lurking a fear of the supernatural which all the discoveries of scientists cannot eradicate.

For me, a hearty “belly laugh” is one of the beautiful sounds in the world.

I think the right to read, is one of our inherent rights, and I think that people in America today are intelligent enough to decide for themselves what they want to read. Without being told, by self-appointed people, you must not read this, or you cannot read this.

The person who can bring the spirit of laughter into a room is indeed blessed.

Politicians are like ships: noisiest when lost in a fog.

Good manners: The noise you don’t make when you’re eating soup.

Oratory is the art of making a loud noise sound like a deep thought.

One of the greatest threats facing book publishing, and the entire country for that matter, is censorship.

The Atomic Age is here to stay – but are we?

The fundamental difference between the mystery story and the ghost story is the fact that a mystery demands a solution for its effectiveness; a ghost story is necessarily unsolvable; the reader must be willing to accept the fact that nothing is proved.

There once was a student named Bessor Whose knowledge grew lessor and lessor. It at last grew so small He knew nothing at all, And today he’s a college professor!

Banquet: a plate of cold, hairy chicken and artificially coloured green peas completely surrounded by dreary speeches and appeals for donations.

One of the troubles of the day, observes Mr. C.N. Peac, is that once we came upon the little red schoolhouse, whereas now we come upon the little-read school boy.

The Detroit String Quartet played Brahms last night. Brahms lost.

A man can fail many times, but he isn’t a failure until he begins to blame somebody else.

Music is a universal language insofar as you don’t need to know anything else about a musician that you are playing with other than that they can play music.

No one else looks out upon the world so kindly and charitably as the pedestrian; no one else gives and takes so much from the country he passes through.

The world that you can go walk outside and walk around the block. That’s reality. The reality that’s being talked about is something else entirely.

The thing I would like to be able to do is to make the music sound right no matter what it is. If somebody else wants to have a label for it, then that’s their business.

My story is going to be completely different than someone else’s story in terms of hard work.

How else would God speak to me, if not through my imagination?

I bleed like nobody else.