Middle age is when your old classmates are so grey and wrinkled and bald they don’t recognize you.
BENNETT CERFFor me, a hearty “belly laugh” is one of the beautiful sounds in the world.
More Bennett Cerf Quotes
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One of the greatest threats facing book publishing, and the entire country for that matter, is censorship.
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The Atomic Age is here to stay – but are we?
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The Detroit String Quartet played Brahms last night. Brahms lost.
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In a notable family called Stein There were Gertrude, and Ep, and then Ein. Gert’s writing was hazy, Ep’s statues were crazy, And nobody understood Ein.
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Most of the things that are supposed to be so objectionable in books are things that every teenager, in the United States, not only knows, but has talked about at length in school, or on the way home from school.
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Banquet: a plate of cold, hairy chicken and artificially coloured green peas completely surrounded by dreary speeches and appeals for donations.
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Politicians are like ships: noisiest when lost in a fog.
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Good manners: The noise you don’t make when you’re eating soup.
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TV’s sameness has destroyed many things, such as the American urge toward independent thought.
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I don’t stutter when I talk to God. He loves me.
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One of the troubles of the day, observes Mr. C.N. Peac, is that once we came upon the little red schoolhouse, whereas now we come upon the little-read school boy.
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The person who can bring the spirit of laughter into a room is indeed blessed.
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I think it’s become fashionable for the snobbish egghead today to make fun of television. I’ve heard many people, boast, “I would never have a television set in my house,” well, these people are fools.
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Gross ignorance is 144 times worse than ordinary ignorance.
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Football season: The only time of the year when a man can walk down the street with a blond on one arm and a blanket on the other without encountering raised eyebrows.
BENNETT CERF