Good manners: The noise you don’t make when you’re eating soup.
BENNETT CERFPoliticians are like ships: noisiest when lost in a fog.
More Bennett Cerf Quotes
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Oratory is the art of making a loud noise sound like a deep thought.
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Do I believe in ghosts? Of course I do. So do you. Deep in the souls of the most sophisticated of us is lurking a fear of the supernatural which all the discoveries of scientists cannot eradicate.
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I don’t stutter when I talk to God. He loves me.
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One of the troubles of the day, observes Mr. C.N. Peac, is that once we came upon the little red schoolhouse, whereas now we come upon the little-read school boy.
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Most of the things that are supposed to be so objectionable in books are things that every teenager, in the United States, not only knows, but has talked about at length in school, or on the way home from school.
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I think it’s become fashionable for the snobbish egghead today to make fun of television. I’ve heard many people, boast, “I would never have a television set in my house,” well, these people are fools.
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One of the greatest threats facing book publishing, and the entire country for that matter, is censorship.
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Middle age is when your old classmates are so grey and wrinkled and bald they don’t recognize you.
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I think the right to read, is one of our inherent rights, and I think that people in America today are intelligent enough to decide for themselves what they want to read. Without being told, by self-appointed people, you must not read this, or you cannot read this.
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TV’s sameness has destroyed many things, such as the American urge toward independent thought.
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The fundamental difference between the mystery story and the ghost story is the fact that a mystery demands a solution for its effectiveness; a ghost story is necessarily unsolvable; the reader must be willing to accept the fact that nothing is proved.
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There once was a student named Bessor Whose knowledge grew lessor and lessor. It at last grew so small He knew nothing at all, And today he’s a college professor!
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For me, a hearty “belly laugh” is one of the beautiful sounds in the world.
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Gross ignorance is 144 times worse than ordinary ignorance.
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Banquet: a plate of cold, hairy chicken and artificially coloured green peas completely surrounded by dreary speeches and appeals for donations.
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