I don’t stutter when I talk to God. He loves me.
BENNETT CERFOratory is the art of making a loud noise sound like a deep thought.
More Bennett Cerf Quotes
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I think it’s become fashionable for the snobbish egghead today to make fun of television. I’ve heard many people, boast, “I would never have a television set in my house,” well, these people are fools.
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There once was a student named Bessor Whose knowledge grew lessor and lessor. It at last grew so small He knew nothing at all, And today he’s a college professor!
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Oratory is the art of making a loud noise sound like a deep thought.
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Middle age is when your old classmates are so grey and wrinkled and bald they don’t recognize you.
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The person who can bring the spirit of laughter into a room is indeed blessed.
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One of the greatest threats facing book publishing, and the entire country for that matter, is censorship.
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Banquet: a plate of cold, hairy chicken and artificially coloured green peas completely surrounded by dreary speeches and appeals for donations.
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For me, a hearty “belly laugh” is one of the beautiful sounds in the world.
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The Detroit String Quartet played Brahms last night. Brahms lost.
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Fame – anyone who says he doesn’t like it is crazy
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The fundamental difference between the mystery story and the ghost story is the fact that a mystery demands a solution for its effectiveness; a ghost story is necessarily unsolvable; the reader must be willing to accept the fact that nothing is proved.
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One of the troubles of the day, observes Mr. C.N. Peac, is that once we came upon the little red schoolhouse, whereas now we come upon the little-read school boy.
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There is a mass of people, we might as well admit, who if they weren’t watching television, would be doing absolutely nothing else.
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Most of the things that are supposed to be so objectionable in books are things that every teenager, in the United States, not only knows, but has talked about at length in school, or on the way home from school.
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Do I believe in ghosts? Of course I do. So do you. Deep in the souls of the most sophisticated of us is lurking a fear of the supernatural which all the discoveries of scientists cannot eradicate.
BENNETT CERF