The divorce rate in 1946 was higher than it ever had been and as high as it ever would be until the ’70s. The reason was that prior relationships had not endured the strain of war.
P. J. O'ROURKEEverybody knows how to raise children, except the people who have them.
More P. J. O'Rourke Quotes
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Israel is slightly smaller than New Jersey. Moses in effect led the tribes of Israel out of the District of Columbia, parted Chesapeake Bay near Annapolis, and wandered for forty years in Delaware.
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Mikhail Gorbachev was the Jimmy Carter of the Communist bloc. The Russians hate him.
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The good news is that, according to the Obama administration, the rich will pay for everything. The bad news is that, according to the Obama administration, you’re rich.
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If you ask the government to solve all of your problems, it’s a bit like asking your wife to cook and clean, to raise the children, to hold down a second job to help with the family finances, to keep her parents happy and well and keep your parents happy and well, and to also – to do the lawn and clean the gutters.
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If you think health care is expensive now, just wait ’til it’s free.
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Government proposes, bureaucracy disposes. And the bureaucracy must dispose of government proposals by dumping them on us.
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The budget doesn’t have much control over the government. Then again, the government doesn’t have much control over the budget.
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I don’t even know which end of a computer one is supposed to gaze into. I’ve never used a computer.
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Sometimes the right response to evil is an appeal to powerful and effective social organization – an appeal to civilization itself.
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Why do elites hate the poor? It’s xenophobia. They don’t know any poor people – except their off-the-books Brazilian nanny and illegal immigrant cleaning lady from Upper Revolta who don’t speak English.
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The Democrats are the party that says government will make you smarter, taller, richer, and remove the crabgrass on your lawn. The Republicans are the party that says government doesn’t work and then they get elected and prove it.
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Always read something that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it.
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Will Generation X and the Millennials do a better job running the world than the boomers have? Let’s hope so.
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Some people have facts; these can be proven. Some people have theories; these can be disproven. But people with opinions are mindless and have their minds made up about it.
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Each child is biologically required to have a mother. Fatherhood is a well-regarded theory, but motherhood is a fact.
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Everybody is xenophobic to an extent.
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New Hampshire polling data are unreliable because, when you call the Granite State’s registered Republicans and independents in the middle of dinner and ask them who they’re going to vote for, they have a mouth full of mashed potatoes and you can’t understand what they say.
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Finland is a rich country. What have they got? They got Nokia phones and plywood. How’d they get so rich? Because they’re free.
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The whole idea of our government is this: If enough people get together and act in concert, they can take something and not pay for it.
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When you’re a war correspondent, the reader is for you because the reader is saying, ‘Gee, I wouldn’t want to be doing that.’ They’re on your side.
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The problem in Afghanistan is really not so much land as water. It’s a dry country with ample amounts of water running through it, but not to good enough effect.
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Politics are for foreigners with their endless wrongs and paltry rights. Politics are a lousy way to get things done. Politics are, like God’s infinite mercy, a last resort.
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Government is a health hazard. Governments have killed many more people than cigarettes or unbuckled seat belts ever have.
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Every vote should carry a serial number, so that responsibility for harmful or careless use of the vote can be traced. Concealed voting should be outlawed.
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I like making things. I have a wood shop at home. I am a terrible carpenter but I love doing it.
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The C student starts a restaurant. The A student writes restaurant reviews.
P. J. O'ROURKE