We don’t see it, and because we don’t see it this means that there is no period so remote as the recent past.
ALAN BENNETT
Mark my words, when a society has to resort to the lavatory for its humour, the writing is on the wall.
More Alan Bennett Quotes
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The trouble is, as soon as you’ve chosen somebody it obscures anybody else you might have thought of.
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Kafka could never have written as he did had he lived in a house.
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Far from wanting time to pass, one just wishes one had more of it. If one wanted to pass the time one could go to New Zealand.
ALAN BENNETT -
I can walk. It’s just that I’m so rich I don’t need to.
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I was an only child. I lost both my parents. By the time I was twenty I was bald. I’m homosexual.
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We have fish and chips, which W. and I fetch from the shop in Settle market-place.
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Imagine that. Per person. This means that if the time scale is diminished in proportion to that of space it would be quite possible for the whole story of Greece and Rome to be played out between farts.
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The liturgy is best treated and read as if it’s someone announcing the departure of trains.
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Standards are always out of date. That’s what makes them standards.
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Art comes out of art; it begins with imitation, often in the form of parody, and it’s in the process of imitating the voice of others that one comes to learn the sound of one’s own.
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Why is it always the “intelligent” people who are socialists?
ALAN BENNETT