“Beauty is in the hand of the beer holder. Beauty is in the heart of the beholder.”

Success is often the result of taking a misstep in the right direction.

If I were the commissioner of all sports media I would issue an immediate ban on three-person announcing teams on telecasts of live sporting events. In almost all cases three is one voice too many.

The voice of experience keeps its mouth shut.

Adolescence is a period of rapid changes.

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Should the beholder have poor eyesight, he can ask the nearest person which girls look good.

We treat this world of ours as though we have a spare in the trunk.

A fool and his money get a lot of publicity.

Spring being a tough act to follow, God created June.

Sometimes the fool who rushes in gets the job done.

Even more exasperating than the guy who thinks he knows it all is the one who really does.

Between the ages of 12 and 17, for example, a parent ages as much as 20 years.

To the victor belong the responsibilities.

If you want to recapture your youth, just cut off his allowance.

We may not know who is craft beer but we sure as hell will know what is craft beer by who isn’t.

And it occurs to me that if I were aboard a rowboat floating in the middle of all the beer I’ve drunk in a lifetime,

I feel sorry for people who do not have a Bible to lean on.

You can only drink 30 or 40 glasses of beer a day.

It is my aim to win the american people over to our side.

To make them all lovers of beer.

I suspect states are going to realize there’s money to be made, and they’ll start to change laws so people can distil to sell. It happened with wine, it happened with beer.

If in 1989 I said, ‘I have an idea: Bottle water and sell it. And charge more than a beer,’ they would have chased me around with a giant butterfly net. The same with paying to watch a television station.