““Poor guy or poor girl, get offstage. You’re killing us.” But if you get onstage and you don’t sing that well but you give it your all, people will be like, “Yeah, I’ll chug beer to this!”.”

” But, in fact, if you do something you like to do and you’re good at it, you’re going to find someone who will like you for that reason.

When you go out with your crew of friends and you get into trouble, at the end of the night when you come home, you’re still the same crew of friends. It’s just the story that you have to tell.

Jealousy is the worst trait in any person.

Listen to your cool, drunk uncle who tells you to lie. Those are the relationships that last.

People want to be friends with someone who likes to have a good time.

It’s really about committing super-hard to whatever you’re trying to create. In essence, I’m just copying my favorite comedic actors, and it’s the people who make me laugh the hardest who commit the hardest.

I come from both a writing background – with ‘Workaholics’ – and I also act in what I’ve written.

If you like standup and decide that it’s overtaking your life and want to hate it, watch 1,000 standup comedians who are trying to get on a TV show.

I’m always thinking, ‘my career is over, I have to move back to Omaha, and work on the railroad, with the rest of my family. So no, I’m never thinking I’ve ‘arrived.’ I think that’s a good way to be.

What’s cool about renting is that you don’t care about your house getting destroyed. So I think that is the number

The thing about singing is that if you’re having fun while doing it then people will have fun watching you do it.

Shakespeare was a smart dude. He was the president of Rome.

In high school I was worried about singing in a choir not being a cool thing, like “I want girls to like me so I don’t want to do something that’s not cool.

“Poor guy or poor girl, get offstage. You’re killing us.” But if you get onstage and you don’t sing that well but you give it your all, people will be like, “Yeah, I’ll chug beer to this!”.

You can shoot a show and have it not air. It’s not real until it’s airing.

That’s another piece of advice: Don’t go to college; follow your dreams. Unless you’re a doctor – then go to college.

My wife’s trying to get me into yoga, and it’s gonna take me a while, but eventually I’m gonna have to.

Trust me. I get up 530-6 every morning. I’m in the gym. I run a couple miles. I lift weights, and then I’m at work until 8-9 o’clock at night.

The attitude that I’m going to show everybody, I’m going to work hard to get better and better.

Get his master’s in criminal justice, stayed out of trouble. Played for three different teams. Changed three different franchises around.

It is the irritation of getting tickets, packing, finding trains, lying in bouncing berths, washing without water, digging out passports, and fighting through customs.

I know when somebody is trying to get something out of me for clicks. And sometimes I feel like giving it to them.

When you’re the commander in chief, you’re the commander in chief on day one. You don’t get like a six-month grace period.

Hope is such an important component to moving forward and getting past the difficult times.