“It’s much harder to act in a bad film than in a good one. A terrible script makes for very difficult acting. You can win an Academy Award for some of the easiest acting in your career, made possible by a brilliant script.”

The trouble with women? Elbows.

I’ve had such a great time, I’d like to come back as me – and do it all over again.

I always exposed the weakness rather than the nastiness.

A man should dress in a way that you don’t notice. He looks good and you don’t know why. But it’s the tailoring, the materials, and the clothes.

I have never seen it but by all accounts it is terrible. However, I have seen the house that it built and it is terrific.

Anyone can write. But comedy, you’ve got to do some writing. You get one comedy script to every 20 dramas.

Save your money. You’re going to need twice as much money in your old age as you think.

The best research for playing a drunk is being a British actor for 20 years.

You’ve got to be flexible. Directors do a massive amount of planning and homework, and if after all that your director decides to throw it all out of the window and shoot spontaneously, then you must follow his lead.

Some men aren’t looking for anything logical, like money. They can’t be bought, bullied, reasoned, or negotiated with. Some men just want to watch the world burn.

I never bring a role home with me. The moment they say, ‘It’s a wrap,’ it’s gone completely. I’m a totally ruthless professional, and life is my family, not my work.

In film, other actors’ performances really are not your concern. If the other actor isn’t giving you what you want, act as though he were.

I never regret anything. I always said that when I’m old, I want to be sitting there regretting the things that I did and not the things that I didn’t do; and now I’m old, and I don’t regret anything! I had fun. I had fun, and I’m still having it.

Hollywood is a cross between a health farm, a recreation center and an insane asylum. It’s a company town, and I happen to like the company!

A lot of people said, Who do you think you are? I told them I know exactly who I am and I’ll tell you exactly where I’m going.

I have been rich and I have been poor. I know which one I prefer.

My first movie, I got nominated for a Canadian Oscar-for Meatballs. For MEATBALLS. And who am I up against? George C. Scott. So he wins the award and I stand up and go, ‘That’s it-let’s get the hell outta here.’

It was pop culture, entertainment, Hollywood, award shows – these are the things that really captivated me as a kid.

I was at the New York Film Critics Circle Awards one year – they called me up when somebody canceled two days before the thing, and asked me to present some awards.

Do awards change careers? Well, I haven’t heard of many stories where that’s the case. It’s a fun excuse to meet colleagues and celebrate people who’ve done well that year in certain people’s eyes, and it’s nothing more than that.

One thing is that I wasn’t getting booked that well, and they had control over who got the awards, they had control over who sold.

Awards don’t really mean much.

You know, the Oscar I was awarded for The Untouchables is a wonderful thing, but I can honestly say that I’d rather have won the U.S. Open Golf Tournament.

Nowadays, what an award gives is a sense of solidarity with the poetry guild, as it were: sustenance coming from the assent of your peers on the judging panel.