They do what they do for money – that’s all. I don’t even know why you’re listening to me. I’ve done commercials for both Coke and Pepsi. Truth is, I can’t even taste the difference, but Pepsi paid me last, so there it is.
DAVE CHAPPELLEI still think people do have racial hang-ups, but I think one of the reasons I can joke about it is people are shedding those racial hatreds.
More Dave Chappelle Quotes
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Everyone around me says, You’re a genius! You’re great! That’s your voice! But I’m not sure if they’re right.
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Remember what the Bible says: He who is without sin, cast the first rock. And I shall smoketh it.
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I have all these weird fantasies. Going coast-to-coast on my motorcycle and having random barbecues all over America. No show, no nothing.
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I’m famous today. People like me today. Might not like me tomorrow. You can’t count on it.
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You got to be careful of the company you keep.
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The worst thing to call somebody is crazy. It’s dismissive.
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The mark of greatness is when everything before you is obsolete, and everything after you bears your mark.
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Stand-up is the kind of gig that’ll show you where you’re at.
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I got a lot of positive people around me.
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Money is the fuel for choices. Money gives me choices, so it’s not nothing, it’s something. But it’s not the end all, be all. There are other things in my life that I did not purchase with money that are very valuable.
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I still think people do have racial hang-ups, but I think one of the reasons I can joke about it is people are shedding those racial hatreds.
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Ralph Nader has slavery reparations on his platform, which makes me think he’s not serious. If he thought he could win he wouldn’t even say that.
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I’m happier in the way a guy gets happier when he starts to mature. It doesn’t make things easier, but I’m so much better at handling them.
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Weed’s not as bad as everything else… ’cause weed is a background substance. You know what I mean, you can smoke some herb and still function. You ain’t crisp… but you’ll function.
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I felt in a lot of instances I was deliberately being put through stress because when you’re a guy who generates money, people have a vested interest in controlling you.
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The only way you can know where the line is, is if you cross it.
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People don’t know what it’s like standing up there onstage, when you have a wall of people smiling at you.
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Fame for me is like a place, a country I’m taking a tour through.
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If I can make a teacher’s salary doing comedy, I think that’s better than being a teacher.
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Comedians by and large are some of the most sensitive people on earth. Even if they’re socially callous.
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Being famous is great, it’s not like bad or horrible or anything.
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When I’m on stage, I get real happy there. Maybe that’s the only time in my adult life I feel like myself.
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I don’t want anything bad to happen to the United States, but if North Korea ever drops a nuclear bomb on this country, I swear to God, I hope it lands in Hartford.
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The higher up I went, the less happy I was.
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Comedy is a very approval-oriented field.
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It seems like there’s never enough famous white people among comic in Hollywood.
DAVE CHAPPELLE